


Extracorporeal

by Cupcakes525



Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-04-03 16:46:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 32,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14000361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cupcakes525/pseuds/Cupcakes525
Summary: This story picks up at the end of 'Chosen' as the bus is pulling away from the Hellmouth. Buffy can feel that something is off as they get further from the city’s ruins.. When a sudden flash of light returns Spike, but only his physical form, she will have to figure out how to find his other half. Meanwhile in LA at Wolfram and Hart, a mysterious package is delivered to the new CEO, Angel. Will he keep his promise to help Buffy fix Spike, or will he let his new-found power and jealousy get in the way?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters fully belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Twentieth Century Fox. I only borrowed the characters for nonprofit entertainment! I do not own the premise of the show or sadly, any of the characters. This was written without any copywriter infringement intended.
> 
>  
> 
> I would like to give a huge thanks to my betas Chrissel, Sunalso, and achebe. Y’all are awesome.

Hello! This is my first written story. I have been reading Spuffy fanfic since the show originally aired and thought it was time to give it a try!

 

Chapter 1

 

As the crowded bus slowly pulled away from the crumbled remains of Sunnydale, Buffy could not pull her eyes away from the crater. 

She knew he was gone. Yet, she knew if she looked away she would miss it. Buffy didn't know what it was, but it caused a slight pit in her stomach and she just knew she could not afford to look away.

The wretched stench of burning hair would not leave her nose, and the searing pain of her small, left hand would not let her forget. He was gone. He died for her and the world. He was a champion... her champion. It was with this realization that it hit her. Buffy truly meant what she had told him beneath the crumbling town. Buffy was in love with William the Bloody. If she was honest with herself, she had been for some time.

"It was too late..." Buffy whispered to herself in a shaky voice. She pressed her forehead against the cool glass of the bus' back window and closed her eyes for just a second. All she could see when she closed them were his piercing, blue eyes as he told her to go. With a quiet, yet heart-shattering sob, Buffy opened her eyes and once again glued her sight on the now distant crater.

It was always in these quiet times, after a heavy shock, that she was left feeling numb and somewhat catatonic. Buffy could feel the eyes of her friends and sister burning holes in her back, but she gave it no mind. She just didn't have the energy for questions right now. 

In fact, Buffy had this strange feeling that she would need to reserve what little strength she still had. Her body was starting to buzz in the way it would if lighting was about to strike nearby. Buffy wanted Giles to stop the bus, but knew they had injured that needed care, so she stayed silent . Even though she knew deep down that something was coming. 

Can anyone else feel this? Buffy thought, as she took a quick glance around the bus. Everyone seemed to be quietly resting and blissfully unaware of her internal distress. Buffy quickly turned her eyes back to the bus's rear window. It must just be me. What is happening? Is in my head? Buffy was a little worried that she might be losing it.

Buffy no longer felt the numbness she was feeling earlier, but instead, she was now experiencing a kind of humming, current flowing throughout her body. As this new sensation intensified, Buffy's skin became covered in goosebumps and the hairs on her arms started to lift. The once heavy pit in her stomach now developed into a painful, twisting sensation. It seemed that the more distance the bus put between itself and Sunnydale, the worse it all got. She could not stand it any more!

Buffy leapt from her seat about to call out to Giles to stop and turn around, when suddenly the morning's sky darkened and was followed by a sudden flash of light. 

The flash came from a brightly, glowing beam of light near the edge of the crater. It seemed like it went on forever, but in actuality it only lasted several seconds.Then the sky returned to its usual morning luster. The only difference was that, now, at the edge of crater, where the pillar of light once shown, lay a black crumpled heap. 

Buffy squinted her eyes to try and make out what was now resting on the edge of the destroyed city. It was when she noticed the steady stream of smoke coming off the prone form, that Buffy understood what she was looking at. Panic overtook the Slayer. 

"Stop the bus! Go back! Go back!" Buffy screamed to Giles as she grabbed a blanket off one of the newly called slayers and threw open the back door of the school bus. Without giving it a second thought, Buffy flung herself out the back of the slowing bus and tucked and rolled into her second adrenaline-fueled run of the day. 

"Hold on Spike! I'm coming! Don't die! I'm coming! Please hold on!" Buffy chanted to herself as she ran.

As Buffy drew nearer, she could start to see flames and an increase in smoke. Why is he just laying there? Take cover damnit! Buffy thought as she pushed herself ever faster! Her legs were shaky and burning with her forced effort and Buffy feared she would not make it to her champion in time. The fear made her focus harder through the pain, and as she neared the engulfed vampire, she flung out her stolen blanket and covered Spike, as she collapsed by his side. 

As Buffy patted out the flames with trembling arms, she coved Spike's still form with hers, in an attempt to further protect him from the sun. Once she was certain that the flames were out and her vampire was safely covered from the sun's deadly rays, Buffy let out the breath that she was not even aware she had been holding. She laid exhausted and limp on top of Spike's oddly warm body and watched the bus, full of her confused and worried friends, backing up in their direction.

With a squealing halt of the bus, the Scoobies and the newly chosen pored out of the same door Buffy herself had just leap from. They were all talking and asking her questions about what had caused her to jump from the moving vehicle and run like the dogs of hell were on her heels. 

Xander was the first to notice the heavily scuffed combat boot sticking out from under the end of the blanket. 

"Spike...." Xander sighed. 

Buffy fixed Xander with a warning glare. Expecting him to say something disapproving or hateful about Spike's return and her desire to save him. To her surprise, however, Xander just sadly smiled at her, nodded and quietly gestured for her to get up. With a sigh of relief, Buffy tried to raise her tired shaky body from Spike's form. Seeing that his friend needed help, Xander gave Buffy a hand and steadied her, before turning to the others. 

"Come on guys, lets get Dead Boy Jr, crispy style, into the bus." 

Buffy was shocked to see the gentle care her friends took with the injured vampire, and once he was securely placed into the back of the bus, Xander returned and helped Buffy climb back into the bus herself. 

With the use of blankets, the flow of sunlight was quickly blocked from the back portion of the bus and, once again, they pulled away from the now obliterated Hellmouth. Buffy realized as they pulled off, that she no longer had the desire to watch what was once her home fade into the distance. 

Her home was now laying with his head in her lap, covered with a dingy, singed blanket. Buffy sat for a long time just quietly staring at the ugly blanket where his beautiful face should be. She was trying to brace herself for what laid beneath. 

Buffy knew, judging from the amount of flames, she was only moments away from losing him again. If she had reached him thirty seconds later, he would not be here in the back of the bus with her now. 

Taking a deep breath, Buffy steeled herself and raised her trembling hand to lift the blanket from Spike's face. Though she had prepared herself for the worst, Buffy still gasped at the ruin of his once handsome, angular face. 

Spike's trademark white hair was now gone along with his dark, expressive eyebrows. His face was no longer smooth and pale, but an angry, blistered mess. Honestly, he was completely unrecognizable, and if it wasn't for his duster, Buffy's tendency for denial may have kicked in, and she would have insisted it wasn't him.

She desperately wanted to rest her hand along his chiseled jaw, to give him some form of comfort or assurance that she was there, but she feared it would only cause more pain and damage. Buffy moved the blanket further down, in hope of finding his hands in a well enough condition for her to hold. With a sigh of relief she found that he must have been laying on his right hand, as it was mostly unscathed. Buffy grasped it tightly, as though her life depended on it.

Buffy needed to be closer to him somehow, if only to convince herself that this was all real and not some horrible nightmare. It was just all so surreal. As Buffy stared at Spike, quiet tears rolled down her face. She didn't know what to do for him. She became so lost in thought that she didn't notice Faith moving to the back of the bus.

"Hey B, how's he doing?" Faith asked Buffy quietly, breaking her from her deep thoughts. Buffy looked up at Faith to see that she was being sincere.

"Its not good, I don't think. He hasn't moved at all, and he is pretty fried.... I just don't know what I can do for him. I think we need to stop and find blood. It should help... with the healing...." Buffy trailed off and quietly stared at Faith, as if hoping that she would have a better idea.

"Sound like a great idea B. I'll let Giles know." Faith paused for a moment and looked down at Spike. He did look pretty bad. Faith swallowed hard and then cleared her throat, "Giles just wanted me to let you know we were heading to LA... Maybe Angel will have an idea of how to help, you know."

"Oh...ok." Buffy paused. She honestly, really didn't want to have to deal with Angel right now, but Faith was right. He may know how to help heal Spike quicker. They were family after all. He couldn’t hate Spike that much. Especially, since he just saved the world. "Just tell Giles to stop at the first butcher shop that we pass. He really needs that blood."

"Sure thing B. Get some rest. You don't look much better than him." Faith silently laid her hand on Buffy's shoulder and gave her a gentle smile.

As Faith turned and made her way to the front of the bus, Buffy suddenly felt an intense exhaustion. It had been a hell of a day. Buffy looked down at the face of man she realized she loved too late. Only now, it dawned on her that it was not too late, as someone had seen fit to return him to her. With a flutter of hope in her heart, Buffy raised Spike's unblemished hand to her lips and kissed it. As she lowered his hand back down to her lap,a small smile played at the corner of her lips and her heavy eyelids slowly closed. 

"I love you, Spike." Buffy whispered, as the gentle rock of the bus sent her into a deep, dreamless sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters fully belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Twentieth Century Fox. I only borrowed the characters for nonprofit entertainment! I do not own the premise of the show or sadly, any of the characters. This was written without any copywriter infringement intended.
> 
>  
> 
> I would like to give a huge thanks to my betas Chrissel, Sunalso, and achebe. Y’all are awesome.

Chapter 2

"Buffy...Buffy wake up! We're here."

Buffy woke to the sound of her sister’s voice and a gentle shaking of her shoulder. She slowly blinked her eyes open and released a big yawn.

"Where's here?" She asked, still groggy and confused. She reached up, to rub her face and pushed her hair back, only to quickly cover her mouth due to another big yawn.

"We're in LA. So, umm...don't freak out, but Giles said we didn't pass any butcher shops on the way." Dawn said in a rush. "But...but it's ok because we're stopped at a hospital, see." She said pointing to the front of the bus. "Oh, and Giles and Xander are playing 'Let's Make A Deal' with the blood bank, so that's good... Willow might have gone with them so maybe magic is involved. I don't re....."

"Oh my god! Dawn, where is Spike?” Buffy interrupted her sister, while jumping up to frantically look around for Spike. She quickly located him, laying in the seat in front of hers, with a fresh blanket and what looked to be a make-shift pillow.

When Dawn had mentioned the blood, she realized that her lap was completely void of a vampire. Buffy was terrified that something had happened to him. She quickly moved past Dawn to check over Spike and make sure there was not further damage done to him.

"Hey, calm down, Buffy! It's ok! He's right here." Dawn moved to let Buffy rush over to Spike.

"Why was he moved? It could have hurt him more! He was fine where he was!" Buffy angrily snapped at her sister, after her quick examination.

" I.. I'm sorry Buffy. I...we just thought... well, I mean, Xander and I moved him, because we just thought you both would get better rest that way...." Dawn trailed off nervously, looking down while twisting her hands together. She was trying not to cry. Dawn really didn't mean to upset her sister. She already felt like she on thin ice with Buffy for the whole kicking her out of the house thing, but she really was trying to help.

Buffy looked up at Dawn to noticed her wet eyes and the slight tremble of her chin. “Yup, so I'm the meanest sister ever," Buffy thought. She sighed as she stood up, turned toward Dawn, and laid her hands on her shoulders.

"I'm sorry Dawnie. It's ok, you didn’t do anything wrong. I just panicked is all. I'm really sorry I snapped at you. I was just scared, but it doesn't make it alright." Buffy then pulled her younger sister in for a tight hug.

Dawn snuffled her nose as she hugged her sister back. "No, it's ok. It been a long day. Everyone is on edge. What with the fight, losing our home and people we loved. Then on top of that add a three hour drive in a crappy school bus cramped to the gills with adrenaline-filled teen girls. Yeah, that would make anyone snappy. We are all on edge."

Buffy chuffed amusingly from her nose and pulled back from Dawn with a small smile on her face. “I guess you’re right, but I am still sorry." Buffy pushed some hair behind her little sister's ear and smiled sweetly up at her. “When did Dawn get so grown up?” Buffy wondered.

Feeling that the tension had passed between them, Buffy looked around the bus and noticed for the first time that, other then Spike's motionless form, she and Dawn were completely alone. Scrunching up her face, she asked, "where did everyone go?"

"Well, some of the girls and Principal Wood are getting patched up, but the rest of the gang pretty much just wanted to get up and move around." Dawn stopped and looked past Buffy and down at Spike. "If it matters any, we were really gentle with him. And I watched over him the whole time. He literally didn't move an inch."

Buffy turn to regard her vampire with furrowed brows and look confused. "Really? Are you sure? Not even a little?" She asked, with a pout.

“Why hadn’t he moved?” Not even when he caught on fire, did he attempt to find cover from the sun. Buffy looked down at Spike with worry etched on her face.

"Nope. Nothing. At least, from what I could tell, anyway. Oh, is he ticklish? Maybe we should try to tickle him. That will make him move!" Dawn asked, with way too much enthusiasm.

"No! There will be no tickling of the comatose vampire, thank you! " Buffy said, firmly, with a glare.

"Ugh, party pooper." Dawn giggled when her sister lifted her eyebrow with a pointed look.

"He probably just needs a little more time to heal. Maybe it's one of those things where the brain shuts down because there is too much pain. Once he heals a little, he will wake up.” Buffy offered hopefully.

"I’m sure that’s it, so you have no reason to worry, Buffy.” Dawn said, to comfort her sister.

When Buffy stared sadly at Spike and didn’t respond to her attempts at support, Dawn decided that maybe her sister just needed a little distraction. “Hey, you know what? You should go use the rest room, maybe get something to eat. Stretch the legs. You know? I’m sure Giles and Xander will be back by time you’re done and we can start trying to feed Spike. You’ll see, he will do just fine! Nothing to worry about.” Dawn finished with a nodding head and big smile.

Buffy knew that Dawn was probably right. It was silly to worry herself, but she just had a really bad feeling about this whole thing.

“Buffy? Did you want to step out for a minute? I promise I’ll stay with him, if that’s what you’re worried about.” Pried Dawn, when her sister still did not respond.

“No, that’s ok Dawnie. I’ll just wait till we get to Angel’s. I think I just want to sit with him till the blood gets here, but thanks for the offer.” Buffy finally responded with a weak smile.

“Ok, but if you change your mind, let me know. I’m gunna just go right outside, talk to some of the girls, and see if there is any news on the injured. I’ll be back in a little bit.” Dawn leant forward and gave her sister another quick hug, before turning and heading to the front of the bus. “Oh and Buffy! If he wakes up before I get back, tell him I’m really happy he is ok.”

Once Dawn had gone, Buffy stood and stared at the spot her sister just occupied. She was lost in thought. She could not believe how much her sister had matured in the last year. How did she miss it?

After a moment had passed, Buffy sighed and slowly turned to look down at Spike. It seemed as though he had healed a little, as his skin didn’t look as angry. That, or it just wasn’t as fresh as it had been, when she had seen it earlier. Buffy sat down on the floor of the bus in between the seat Spike was laying on and the one it front of it. She pulled up her knees, hugged them to her chest, and placed her head on top of them, with her face pointing toward Spike. Buffy then reached up to hold his unscathed hand, and used her thumb to make small circles on his calloused skin.

“Looks like it’s just you and me.” Said Buffy in a quiet voice.

She let her eye trace the lines of his face and body. From the shoulders down he was very familiar. Not too much had changed, since his body had been mostly protected from the sun by his beloved duster. Spike’s face, however was completely foreign to her. She could still make out the angles of his face, beneath the swelling, but other than that, she could not see the beautiful man she loved.

While studying him, Buffy found that she even missed Spike’s stupid day-glow hair and the impossible way he chose to slick it back. She smiled at the memory of how she would purposely run her hands through his hair when they would kiss, and how annoyed he’d pretend to get. He would grumble about “handsy birds” messing up his hair, while trying to slick it back in place. At the time, it was definitely her way of being passive aggressive, but how she loved the way it felt between her fingers. How soft it was once you got beneath all that paster he put in there. Not to mention, how adorably boyish he looked with all those curls. She wondered if he would bleach it again once it grew back. Would it grow back? She really hoped it would. Maybe she would finally tell him how much she liked the curls over the cement helmet. Would he stop slicking it back? He would. Buffy could see him now. He would act all put out about out by having to wear “Nancy-boy” hair, but, deep down, he would be happy to do it for her. Buffy could not help but giggle a little at that thought.

Most of all though, Buffy missed his eyes. Not just his eyes, but the emotions he so clearly expressed with them. His eyes always threw her for a loop. Back before, when she believed that without his soul he had no feeling, she would get so confused by the emotions she saw there. She thought he was just different, or maybe he was just really good at pretending, but, as she got to know him, she knew she was wrong. He could feel things, just like her or anyone else. Even if, at that time, she was still unwilling to admit it. Her own eyes started to water, as she thought of the loving way he would look at her. They were so blue. He probably had the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen.

Buffy closed her eyes to try to visualize his face as it was before. She just wanted him to get better and wake up. So she could hear him call her “luv” or “pet” again. She also couldn’t wait to be able to lay down at night in his arms. She had never slept as good as she had those last couple of nights in Sunnydale. Buffy found that she was quite comfortable wrapped in his arms.

Buffy was so deep in her thoughts of Spike, that she did not hear someone enter the bus. When Giles made his way to the back of the bus, he was surprised to find Buffy sitting on the floor. Her eyes were closed and she looked as if she was deeply concentrating on something. Giles quietly cleared his throat to get her attention. Buffy’s head shot up with wide eyes that relaxed once she saw it was Giles.

“Hey Giles.” Letting go of Spike’s hand, Buffy slowly rose from her seat on the floor, and faced her Watcher. An awkward silence stretched out between them for a few moments, and Giles removed his glasses and started to vigorously clean them. He decided that it was time for him to admit he may have been wrong about Spike.

“Buffy, I believe there are some things for which I need to apologize. First, and fore-most, Robin and my plan to dispose of Spike. Knowing what I know now, I do believe I was a tad hasty in my decision. I was worried for your wellbeing, and that of the young girls in my charge. But that being said, I should have stood by you, when you thought he could be trusted. You have rarely ever been wrong when relying on your instincts. For this, I am truly sorry. I hate to think where we would be now, if our attempts at his life were successful.” Giles paused, and waited to see if Buffy had anything to say, but, judging from her silence, she did not. Giles placed his glasses back on his face and returned his cloth back in his pocket, before he continued to attempt to mend the rift between he and his Slayer. “Right, there is another matter that I fear I need to address with you. We should have never thrown you out of your home. We doubted your abilities as a leader, when we shouldn’t have. You have always been an excellent leader and one poor call should not have negated that fact. I would like to speak for myself, as well as the others, when I say we are deeply sorry and ashamed of our behavior.”

Buffy was quiet for a little longer. Giles was done speaking and the ball was clearly in her court. “Can I trust him again or should I pull back?” Buffy thought. He had been like her father for the last seven years. Buffy looked down and scrunched her brows in thought.

“Giles… I just don’t know what to think. You really hurt me,” she said, looking up at her watcher. “ I appreciate the apologies, really I do, but I don’t know if I can trust you. What happens if Spike loses his soul somehow? Do I have to worry about you sending another hit man? I think you should know that I love him. In love with him. I know that worries you, but it’s not going to be like it was with Angel. Even without his soul, Spike was more loving and compassionate then Angel is with one. Are you going to be able to accept and respect that I want to be and will be in this relationship? If you can’t, then I’m going to have to make a hard choice that I…”

“Buffy, stop right there. Of course I will accept and respect your relationship. I would also like to think I’m not such a prat, that I haven’t learned from my mistakes. It may take me time to adjust to this new relationship, but I would have had to have been blind not to have seen it coming. Even before the soul, there was always a clear connection between the two of you. I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but if I had to choose between Spike and Angel, I would choose Spike any day. At least he can carry on a somewhat intelligent conversation and has decent taste in music. I, also, believe that he has more respect for you than Angel ever did and sees you for more than a Slayer and her duty. I love you as my own child; there is no way I could not respect that.”

Buffy eyes watered as she listened to her surrogate father. She could clearly hear the sincerity in his voice. Without warning, Buffy launched herself at the older man, trapping him in a tight, Slayer-strength hug. It wasn’t until Giles started to grunt about needing air and bruised ribs, that Buffy let Giles go.

“I love you, Giles and I really appreciate you saying that.” Buffy said, with a sweet, watery smile.

“Yes, well I’m quite glad to hear that and I love you too, Buffy.” Giles bashfully replied with a goofy smile and awkward pat on her shoulder.

“So, Dawn said something about you and Xander haggling for some blood from the blood bank? Any luck on that front?” Buffy asked.

“Right, yes! I must say, it was a far easier task then I had anticipated. It must have to do with it being a large city. The women didn’t even bat an eye. I left Xander to finish the transaction, so I could check on those that need medical attention, and so I could speak with you privately. I do believe that Xander was going to bring it here, after he gathered the remaining group, so we can head to the Hyperion to meet up with Angel. He should be here any moment.”

“Ok good, I’m so happy to hear that. I really want to get some blood into Spike, so that he can heal and hopefully wake up.”

Giles face became concerned, as he took a glance at Spikes unmoving form. “He hasn’t said anything since you rescued him?”

“No, he hasn’t even moved. He never even tried to get out of the sun, in fact. I just figured that maybe he was in some kind of pain-induced coma.” From the look on Giles’ face Buffy, was getting a little nervous.

“That’s possible, right?” She hesitantly asked.

“Um, well, not usually, but the circumstances are a bit out of the norm. Don’t worry Buffy, I’ll do some research once we get to the hotel. They are bound to have some books I can use to look this up. Also, maybe Willow will know a spell that can help us figure out what is actually going on.”

“What are we trying to figure out?” Willow’s cheery voice traveled down from the front of the bus. She was soon followed by Kennedy and Xander.

“I come bearing succulent, almost out of date, vamp snacks! Who’s the man! Xan-man!” Xander announced giddily, only to quickly become serious when he noticed Buffy’s somber face.

“Buff, what’s with the long face?” His eyes got big and pushed past Willow and Kennedy in a panic. “I wasn’t too late was I? He didn’t…?” His question dying mid-sentence when he noticed Spike still laying where he and Dawn had left him.

“No, you are fine, Xander. I’m just worried, because Spike hasn’t woken up, or moved since he appeared at the edge of the crater. I thought it was a pain equals coma thing, but Giles just told me that probably was not the case. Willow do you know any spells you can do to try and figure what’s going on with him?”

“I’m sorry Buffy, but I don’t know any off the top of my head, but I can definitely look one up,” said Willow.

“Ok, thank you. That would be great!” Buffy said, leaning over to hug her friend.

“Hey Xand, can I get some of that blood? I want to see if I can get him to eat anything,” asked Buffy.

“Yeah, sure. Here ya go m’a lady,” said Xander, as he passed a paper sack full of blood bags to Buffy.

During the exchange Dawn entered the bus with a long tail of once potential, but now chosen, girls. As they all began to settle in, Giles started a head count while while moving to the driver’s seat, and Buffy turned to Spike. She decided that it would be easiest to feed him with his head in her lap, like he was earlier. As Buffy bent to remove the bundled up fabric being used to pillow Spike’s head, a sweet smile crossed her face. She recognized the the fabric all too well. It was Xander’s jacket. Blinking away the tears and swallowing the lump in her throat, Buffy turned and called out to her friend.

“Xander!”

He stopped, half-way in his seat, and looked up at Buffy.

Holding up the jacket so he could see, she smiled brightly and said, “you are the man. Thank you!” With that she sat down and situated Spike’s head in her lap, and prepared to try and feed him.

Xander smiled as he sat in his seat, and nodded his head once. “Yeah, I know,” he said to himself.

Once everyone was settled into their spot, Giles started the bus and they began the short drive to the Hyperion Hotel.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters fully belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Twentieth Century Fox. I only borrowed the characters for nonprofit entertainment! I do not own the premise of the show or sadly, any of the characters. This was written without any copywriter infringement intended.
> 
>  
> 
> I would like to give a huge thanks to my betas Chrissel, Sunalso, and achebe. Y’all are awesome.

Chapter 3

 

By time they had reached the Hyperion, Buffy’s eyes had become filled with tears of frustration. She had tried everything thing she could think of to get him to eat, short of opening a vein, and at this rate, she was, in no way, above that. “Hopefully, Angel’s team will have an idea on how to help Spike,” Buffy thought, as the bus pulled up in front of the hotel.

Honestly, she wasn’t all that hopeful on Angel’s willingness to help, judging from his petty behavior only two days before. He was bound to be pretty upset once he realized she has changed her tune on whether or not Spike was her boyfriend. Because he definitely was… even if he didn’t know yet.

Most of Buffy’s hope laid with Angel’s team. She knew that, while Angel may not like Spike, his team would probably not have many qualms when it came to helping another souled vampire, especially one that just sacrificed himself for the world. At least, that is what she hoped for, but she wouldn’t be surprised if Angel try to get in the way.

As the girls and the gang started to collect their things and head to the exit, Buffy was trying to figure out the best way to get Spike from the bus and to the safety of the hotel in broad daylight. She really wanted to avoid as much combustion as possible, considering Spike was already pretty crispy.

While collecting her emergency travel bags, Willow noticed that Buffy was still sitting in the back of the bus and appeared to be distressed. “Sweetie, I’m gunna meet you in there. I think Buffy is going to need some help with Spike,” she said, turning to Kennedy.

“Um ok... I’m sure she can handle it, but fine,” Kennedy said, with a slightly annoyed tone. When she saw Willow was taken aback by her comment and pouting, Kennedy huffed and sweetened her voice and asked, “Do you want me to give you a hand?”

“That’s ok. I think Xander and I can handle it,” said Willow, with a slight glare. She then sighed and decided to file her irritation for a better time.

“Buffy seems a little stressed and I think she would prefer if only we were to help her. I’ll see you inside,” Willow said, as she tried to exit her seat. 

Kennedy put her hand lightly on Willow’s arm to stop her to give her a parting kiss. When Willow turned toward her, she leaned in, only for Willow to shift her face so Kennedy’s kiss landed on her cheek, instead of its intended target. Willow then, hastily pushed her way into the crowded bus aisle, leaving her jilted girlfriend behind.

As Willow wormed her way to the back of the bus, she caught Xander’s eye and nodded her head in the direction of Buffy, before continuing her way over to the Slayer.

Taking the hint from his friend, Xander quickly followed Willow and worked his way to the far end of the bus. As he made it to the back, he could see why his attention had been drawn to Buffy.

She was sitting quietly with creased brows and chewing on her bottom lip. Buffy was just staring at the blanket to her left, as though she was looking out the window. Spike was still laying across the seat with his knees hanging over the edge and his head resting in Buffy’s lap. The bottom half of his unrecognizable face was covered in blood. As Xander came to a stop, next to Willow, he noticed it wasn’t just the immobile vampire covered in blood, but his friend as well. Buffy’s hands, shirt, and pants where covered with blood.

“Holy blood Batman! Someone forgot their table manners,” said Xander, in attempt to lighten Buffy’s mood.

Unfortunately, it did the exact opposite, because her chin started to wobble, which was followed by big huge tears, that rolled down her cheeks. When she silently looked up at Xander, with her big, round, wet eyes, he felt like an ass.

“I was just trying to make you smile. The blood gave me the wiggins, so I made a joke,” Xander said, then swallowed. He looked over at Willow for support, found that she was giving him a sour look. “Buffy, I’m really sorry. I wasn’t trying to upset you more. Again, Buff, I’m sorry,” he said, sincerely with a small smile.

“What happened, Buffy? What can we do to help? Other than making poorly timed jokes?” Asked Willow, giving a pointed look to her other friend.

“It’s ok Xander,” Buffy said, wiping the tears from her cheeks with the back of her hand. “I’m just frustrated and still really tired. I guess a little scared too. I can’t get him to eat. He won’t change, so no fangs. I thought if I put some in his mouth it would be instinctual and he would just swallow it, but it just keeps pouring out the side of his mouth. I even tried to rub on his gums where his fangs pop out, and again, a big fat nothing. That always wo…” Buffy trailed off when she noticed her last comment caused Willow to bush and raise her brows, while Xander choked on air. “Not that I would know… I mean, I read it…...you know, in one of Giles’ books,” Buffy tried to quickly explain, looking as innocent as possible.

“Maybe he is just not hungry,” Willow suggested, trying to give Buffy a pass, while moving away from the awkward subject. 

Buffy was about to respond when Xander spoke first, “There is no way he is not hungry. He used to live in my basement. The guy is a bottomless pit. He will literally eat anything he sees. Plus, he is really damaged right now. He would want to eat to heal himself,” explained Xander.

“Xander’s right. His crypt used to have all kinds of snacks stashed around it and he didn’t even need to eat that stuff. He just liked to,” Buffy agreed.

“Maybe it has something to do with the soul,” Willow suggested. When she was received with two blank stares, she explained, “Maybe he doesn’t want to drink human blood? Maybe even his subconscious knows he would object to the real deal. We could try the animal variety, see if he accepts it better.”

“I guess that could make sense,” Buffy hesitantly agreed with the redhead.

Willow just shrugged her shoulders and replied, “It can’t hurt to try. Anyway, Angel is sure to have some.”

“Pfff,” Buffy said, rolling her eye. “Like he is going to help. He was like a jealous teenager when he stopped by two days ago. Got all huffy because I was giving him the brush off for Spike. You know, he actually sniffed me? Sniffed me! It’s just so creepy. It was like when he found out I was dating Riley all over again. The only difference is that he didn’t try to beat Spike up, but you know if he saw him he would have,” Buffy explained in a rush and then huffed. “To make matters worse, I got all swept up, with his gallant entrance and kissed him. Then, when he started asking questions about Spike, I panicked. I told him that Spike wasn’t my boyfriend, but let’s face it, Spike is so my boyfriend. Then I went into a big speech about cookie dough and not being baked, giving a pretty heavy implication that he would be the one eating baked Buffy cookies!” Buffy said slightly frantic. “Buffy is cookies, guys, and guess who we know that loves cookies most of all?” Buffy asked.

“Oh, Cookie Monster!” Xander exclaimed, pointing at Buffy with a huge smile. Both girls gave him the patented, “What?” look.

“No, Xander… Spike. Spike likes cookies. He always had them hidden in his bed-side drawer next to his poetry.”

Xander giggled and leaned over to Willow and whispered, “I really thought she was going to say porn, at the end of that sentence. Owww!”

Willow elbowed Xander in the ribs. “Be serious Xander,” she scolded, with her resolve face firmly in place.

“Sorry.”

“Buffy, I’m sure he isn’t going to just let Spike starve. They have known each other for over a century. They are family,” Willow said, in an attempt to reason with her friend.

“He staked his own sire, then later, after she was resurrected, he set her and Drusilla on fire. Not much of a family man,” Buffy explained, in a dead-pan voice.

“Oh… well, I was a bit out of the loop on that last part, but I still think that there is a chance. Even if we can’t get Angel to help, there is always his team. I know for fact, that if I ask Fred for help she would and I’m pretty sure Wesley would be on our side, once he knew that Spike has a soul and what he did with it,” Willow said, reassuringly.

“Well, that’s what I’ve been hoping for. The help of his team, but I’m pretty sure he isn’t going to like it. I would bet money, that he will get in the way somehow,” Buffy said.

“Well, we won’t know till we get in there, Buff.”

“I know, you’re right Xander, but that is the other thing that had me upset,” Buffy explained. “How am I going to get him in there safely, without another fire show? I don’t think he could take another sun exposure. It is still another four hours till sun down and I don’t really want to make him wait that long.”

“Well, we can help you with that! We, cover him with a couple of blankets and you and Xander can carry him out. Also, I know a short term UV protection spell that could give him some extra protection,” offered Willow.

“Wouldn’t you need supplies for that Wills?” Asked Xander.

“Nope. It’s more of an incantation than a spell. It’s not good for a full-on exposure, but it’s worth a try for protecting him from partial exposure, at least.”

“Ok, yeah. Let’s do that,” Buffy said, standing up and gently lowering Spike’s head onto the seat. She then retrieved the blanket that Dawn and Xander had given to him earlier and draped it over his face and upper body. “All right Xander, we have to be really careful, but fast. Getting down the steps will be tricky. If you see or smell smoke tell Willow and she can readjust the blanket. Now, do you want his head or his feet?” 

“Um, I’ll take his feet. That’s where I can do the least amount of damage,” Xander explained, as he headed to Spike’s legs and grabbed him by his knees. Looking up at Buffy he asked, “You ready?”

Buffy nodded her head and maneuvered herself in a position where she could reach under Spike’s shoulders and then hooked her arms into his armpits. She then lifted her vampire’s upper body so his head was supported by her abdomen.

As Xander started to back into the now empty bus aisle, Willow started to chant in Latin, “A sole protegit lamia.”

As Buffy followed Xander toward the bus entrance, she let out a quick clip of laughter. “You know, it’s kinda funny. I thought you would have said you would do less damage to his head, in an attempt to take a jab at Spike’s intelligence. What’s the change of heart? You’ve never really been team Spike, so what’s the catch, Xander?,” Buffy asked, good-naturedly.

“Well, you know. The whole sacrificed his life for the world really helps, but mostly I want to you to be happy Buffy. If anyone deserves...” Xander quickly stopped talking, when his voice cracked with emotion. He quickly cleared his throat and continued, “If any one deserves it, it’s you. Anya is gone and it hurts, because she isn’t coming back, but Spike did. There has to be a reason for that, even if it is just to make you happy. So I’m going to do everything I can to make that happen, Buff. I’m pretty sure you would do it for me,” Xander explained, with a sweet smile.

Buffy thought that had to have been one of the nicest things she had ever heard Xander say. “Thank you, Xan. I love you! If I was not carrying a stupidly, heavy vampire right now, you would so be getting the biggest hug ever!”

“Right? The guy has to have lead weights in his coat pockets. For such a little guy, he is awful heavy. I mean how many cookies was he eating?” Xander jokingly, agreed.

“I’m sure it’s mostly dead weight. Plus, a heavy leather jacket and steel-toe boots, but I got to say, it’s a good thing that Buffy cookies are a low-fat snack. Wait, are there actual cookies or is it a metaphor and you are the cookie?” Questioned Willow.

“I don’t know? I think it’s a metaphor and I’m the cookie. Oh, but I could bake some cookies too!” Buffy said, excitedly, as she stopped with Xander in front of the steps leading out of the bus.

“You should see if Dawn can help you with those. You know, if you actually want him to eat them,” suggested Xander.

“Hey!”

“He’s right, sweetie,” Willow agreed, patting Buffy on the shoulder, causing her friend to pout.

“Yeah, I know,” Buffy agreed, with a small pout. “Ok, you ready for this, Xander? We will take the stairs nice and slow but once we are out there let’s move fast.”

Xander nodded his head in the affirmative.

“Willow is the protective incantation done?” Buffy asked

“Yup, all done.” Said Willow.

“Alright, let’s go.”

Xander slowly stepped back onto the first step and then the next, with Buffy slowly following him. All went well until, unknown to Buffy, the pointy toe of her boot caught onto an edge of the blanket and as her foot lowered off the last step, the blanket started to slip off Spike’s body.

“Aequaliter Nubila!” Shouted Willow, causing the sky to darken with a sudden overcast. Completely unfazed, unlike her friends, by the sudden weather change, Willow quickly recovered Spike with the blanket. When she looked up both her friends where staring at her in shock.

“What?”

“Um, Will, did you just change the weather?” Asked Xander.

“It’s just a little clouds,” she said looking up at the sky. “I should have probably done that first, honestly.”

“Thank you, Willow. Your fast thinking probably saved him.” Buffy said, with gratitude and a smile. “Also, that’s a pretty neat trick!”

“Yeah, really handy in the reverse on a rainy day and you’re welcome. Now let’s go. Clouds won’t last forever.”

The three friends then swiftly transported Spike into the front door of the Hyperion hotel. Willow held the door open for Buffy and Xander and as she stepped in after them she mumbled the Latin phrase for clarity. When the door closed behind them, the dark clouds quickly dissipated, leaving down town LA, once again, bright and sunny.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters fully belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Twentieth Century Fox. I only borrowed the characters for nonprofit entertainment! I do not own the premise of the show or sadly, any of the characters. This was written without any copywriter infringement intended.
> 
>  
> 
> I would like to give a huge thanks to my beta Sunalso.

Chapter 4

 

Upon entering the hotel, the three friends and unresponsive vampire had gone unnoticed, as all the room’s occupants were focused on the heated argument taking place between Angel and Giles. Curious about what was going on, Willow went to go stand with her girlfriend at the service desk. Neither Buffy nor Xander were as interested in the ongoing dispute as they quietly moved further into the building’s entrance and down the steps. Once at the bottom, Buffy nodded her head to the left where a group of red couches was situated. Taking his friend’s direction, Xander headed to the longest of the couches and noticed Vi intensely watching the discussion, as though she was enjoying a tennis match.

“Hey, Vi,” Xander said, trying to get her attention. When she turned to acknowledge Xander, she realized that they wanted to lay Spike on the couch, she smiled and quickly grabbed her bag and slipped over to a big chair, catty-corner to the couch, once again, turning her attention to the argument.

As they laid Spike onto the couch, Buffy thanked Xander for his help and then turned back to vampire and arrange him comfortably. As she grabbed one of the couch’s decorative pillows, Buffy overheard Giles mention something about wolves and rams. She rolled her eyes as she placed the pillow below Spike’s head, then stood up and placed her hands on her hips. “You two have to be kidding me! Of all the times, NOW is not the time to fight about animals. I mean, come on, what is this? Some weird sports thing?” Buffy chastised, only to become uncomfortable when everyone, minus Xander, turned and looked at her like she grown a second head. “What?” She asked.

“Buffy, we are not fighting about animals or sports, but the fact that Angel and his team have chosen to join Wolfram and Hart, a multidimensional evil law firm. Angel is now the head of the LA branch. He also failed to tell us that this is where he acquired the amulet,” explained Giles, pointedly looking at Angel.

Buffy gazed blankly at Giles for a moment, slowly blinking. She then tilted her head in a way that was reminiscent to Spike’s head tilt and fixed her now cold, glaring stare onto Angel.

“Hey, don’t look at me like that! I told you it wasn’t a reliable source and that we didn’t know enough about the amulet. That it probably wasn’t safe. Anyways, I don’t understand why you all are so upset. Buffy sent me away. I didn’t make her give it to Spike. In fact, I had planned to wear it myself, but I got to say, kinda glad I didn’t now. Don’t get me wrong, I’m really sorry about Spike, but he has to know he wasn’t coming out of that. The amulet closed the Hellmouth…saved the world. Wasn’t that what you wanted? Why does it matter where it came from?”

“It does matter! If I had known that it was connected to an evil law firm, I would have found another way. I certainly would not have sent my boyfriend down there with that thing draped around his neck,” yelled Buffy.

“Ah-ha! Boyfriend! I knew you were lying. There was no way you could be that covered in his scent and him just be “in your heart”. I’m starting to think he was in a whole lot more than just your heart,” Angel angrily accused.

“Hey!”

“That is quite enough!” Both Xander and Giles exclaimed at the same time.

“Ugh, it’s ok guys, I got this,” Buffy said, sneering at Angel. “How dare you! It’s none of your business where Spike has been when it comes to my body and, frankly, I just don’t have time for your jealousy shit. Grow the fuck up and move on, Angel.” Buffy turned to Wesley and asked, “Where do you keep the blood?”

“There is a fridge in the office. The door is just past the service desk. You should find some in there,” said Wesley.

“Thank you,” she replied, as she started to walk toward the office. “Xander, stay with Spike, and Angel, if you value your life, don’t even think about touching him,” threatened Buffy, disappearing into to office.

Angel’s eyes dropped to the charred top of Spike’s head, “Wait, he survived? The amulet didn’t kill him?”

“Why do you ask, Dead Boy? Was that what you were hoping for? Maybe you wanted to get rid of the competition?” Xander asked while moving to stand protectively in front of Spike.

“No, I just assumed that the amulet would have been fatal for whom ever wore it during the battle. Also, please. It’s Spike we’re talking about. He has never been anyone’s competition,” Angel chuckled. “All he has ever been for any woman is convenient.”

Buffy flinched with guilt when she overheard Angel’s comment from the other room. In her mind, she could clearly see the pain that would pass through Spike’s eyes whenever she would speak of his convenience. Of course, she was now able to admit to herself that she was just using that to convince herself he didn’t mean anything to her. The more she thought about the things she has said and done to him over the years, the less she could blame Spike for not believing her when she told him she loved him. She definitely had a lot of work cut out for her once he woke up. She would prove to him that she loved him, even if it was the last thing she did.

Buffy jumped when the beep of the microwave pulled her from her thoughts and she shook her head to clear it before retrieving Spike’s meal. Taking a claiming breath and placing her Slayer mask back on, Buffy straighten her back and walked back into the lobby. “Well, FYI, he didn’t make it and the amulet was extremely fatal. Also, to clear another thing up, he was never just a convenience and it’s you who isn’t competition for him,” informed Buffy as she hurriedly carried two cups of warm blood over to Spike. She then kneeled in front of the couch and rubbed some blood on Spike's lips, hoping to get a reaction.

“Must not have been too fatal,” said Gunn, walking closer to peer over the back of the couch. “I mean, damn! The guy looks like burnt toast, but he’s not ash, so I wouldn’t call that fatal.”

“He actually reappeared unconscious on the edge of the crater as we were driving away,” explained Dawn. “There was this big flash of light and then there he was, just lying on the ground. The sun had already risen so Buffy had to save him. That’s where the toastiness comes in. She actually jumped out the back of the bus before it even stopped moving, ran to him, and covered him from the sun before he could dust.”

Buffy stood with a huff. “This just isn’t working. I can’t get him to eat. It’s like nobody is home. I don’t know what to do.” Buffy got more frantic as she spoke. By the time she finished, her eyes were threatening to spill over with tears. “We need to figure out what’s wrong,” she said to the group, then turned to Angel. “Do you have any suggestions or are you going to be a petty child and not help?”

Angel was quiet a moment, with his arms crossed across his chest and brooding look on his face. “Honestly, you should….”

“I swear to God, Angel, if you suggest a stake, I will shove one so far up your ass that you will be coughing up tooth picks and then I will make sure that it’s you that has a dusty ending,” threatened Buffy.

Angel’s eyes darkened with anger and he let out a low, growl. “Fine…. Then l guess I have no suggestions,” he said in a tight, infuriated voice. Both Angel and Buffy stood glaring at each other.

In an attempt to cut the tension between the Slayer and vampire, Wesley cleared his throat and inquired, “Angel, I thought you said only someone with a soul could wear the amulet.”

“Oh, why am I not surprised! He didn’t tell you,” said Buffy.

“Tell us what?” Asked Gunn.

“Oh, just that Spike has a soul. One that he fought for in Africa,” Buffy said, staring down Angel. She turned her head and looked at Wesley before continuing, “He searched out a demon, passed his trials, and was then granted a wish… his soul. He isn’t cursed and there are no loop holes. He chose to become a better man. He fought for it.”

“Why didn’t you tell us about Spike’s soul, Angel?” asked Fred.

“I didn’t think it was important. So what, he has a soul. A vampire with a soul is nothing new. I’ve had mine for a century.”

“No, you didn’t want them to know you weren’t the only one. You didn’t want them to know he chose his and it wasn’t put on him as punishment,” accused Dawn, standing with her hands on her hips and looking eerily similar to her sister when she is ready to kick ass.

“Let me get this straight. Spike, as a soulless vampire, willingly decided to seek out and fight for his soul, then he returned to Sunnydale and started fighting the good fight?” asked Wesley.

“Well, honestly,” Giles said with a sigh, “He has been helping us for a while now. For a couple of years, in fact. He helped me when one of my old mates turned me into a Fyarl Demon. He protected Dawn and Joyce when Glory was trying to locate the Key and played a big part during the battle against her. Hell, he even stayed in Sunnydale and helped us keep the demon population down by patrolling. Not mention, he watched over and babysat Dawn the summer Buffy was gone. Spike has been fighting for the good side long before the soul. Even if we never gave him credit for it,” Giles finished, sharing a look with his Slayer.

Wesley hummed, “Intriguing, so he wore the amulet into the Hellmouth and sacrificed his life to stop the apocalypse?”

“Yes,” said Buffy and Dawn at the same time.

“Then he was returned in a flash of light? Was he breathing or appeared to be alive?” questioned Wesley, heading to his brief case and pulling out some notes that he had packed.

“Wesley, you’re not trying to suggest he Shanshued are you? That prophecy is about me. We know that,” gripped Angel.

“No, Angel, we assumed it was about you because you were the only souled vampire, but Spike seeking out and obtaining his soul could have changed everything,” Wesley explained to pouting vampire, before turning to Buffy and asking, “Did he appear to be alive? Does he have a pulse?”

“No and no. He was and still is unconscious. He didn’t even try to get out of the sun when he caught fire. He just laid there, nor has he moved since he returned. Also, he is clearly still a vampire, considering his pretty extreme reaction to sunlight. Which is why he is in such bad shape now,” answered Buffy. “What is this ‘Shawn Shoes’ what does it have to do with Spike?”

“Shanshu. It is a prophecy,” Wesley corrected handing a copy of his notes to Giles. “The Shanshu prophecy states that, a vampire with a soul will play a large part in an apocalypse and if he fulfills his destiny, or gives his life for the cause, that he will then be return as human. It will be his reward. Like I said before, we always thought that it spoke of Angel, but with this change in information, it could be possible that Spike is the vampire it is referring to.”

“But he isn’t human. He is still a card-carrying member of the undead party,” stated Xander.

“I should have a lot more resources to research, regarding the prophecy, once I get to Wolfram and Hart. I know that it discomforts you, Giles, but our hope is to take it down from the inside. However, in the mean time, it should not hurt to also use some of the resources they have at hand. The information they carry could be imperative to figuring out what is going on with Spike and whether or not he is, in fact, connected to this prophecy,” said Wesley.

“First, we need to find a way to get him to eat,” stated Willow. “Buffy tried feeding him blood from the hospital on the way here, but he wouldn’t change into his wrinklies or even swallow the blood. We thought maybe it was because his soul was subconsciously rejecting the human blood so we wanted to try pigs blood, but that clearly didn’t work either. Do you have any magic books or spell books that I can use to do some research? I want to see if I can find some kind of spell that will allow me to look inside his mind and wake him up or even one that can detect what is happening to him.”

“Yes, we do have a few back in the office, with the rest of our research books, but, again, we will have a much greater resource base at the law firm,” answered Wesley.

“We even can do some scans there,” offered Fred. “I’m the head of the science department, there has to be something in the lab that can help. Even if it’s some kind of circulatory machine for vampires. That way we can set him up with an IV until he wakes up. And if they don’t have something like that, there is nothing saying that I can’t try to make one myself.”

Buffy was unsure. It all sounded like a great next step. Like things she needed to help Spike, but she didn’t know if she could trust the source. They could be behind all of this. The amulet did, after all, come from them. Buffy wrapped her arms around herself and started to chew her lip as she thought. What other choices did she have?

“Buffy, what would you like us to do?” Giles asked, gently.

Buffy sighed and looked her Watcher in the eye, hoping to find the answer. “I don’t know. I mean it sounds all fine and dandy, but how do we know we can trust them? Especially now I know that’s where the amulet came from. Giles, how do I know that they won’t hurt him? What do you think we should do? I want him to heal, but I just don’t know how else to do that,” Buffy pleaded with Giles.

“Buffy, ultimately, it is your decision. Whatever you decide, I will support. However, if you want my opinion, I think we should stay here for tonight. We have all had a long day and need rest. We can see what we can find with the resources at hand and if by the morning we find that there has been no change in Spike’s condition, or we haven’t discovered any new information, then we can consider going to Wolfram and Hart for help,” suggested Giles.

Buffy turned to look over at Spike, as he laid motionless on the couch. She could not remember a time when he was ever this still. Even when he slept, his muscles would twitch and his eyes would move beneath his eyelids as he dreamt. He even used to talk in his sleep, because God knows, he could never shut up, but now there was no muttering about footwear or that show ‘Passions’. There was nothing. Just a body. A cold, still, damaged body.

Buffy swallowed back the lump in her throat and nodded her head. “Ok, I think we will do what Giles suggested. Let’s all get some rest and start new tomorrow. Willow and Giles, check out Wesley’s book collection. See what you can find. Anyone who feels up to helping with research efforts, that would be greatly appreciated. Fred, do you know if there are enough rooms ready for guests?”

“Oh, sure! Let me get the keys and I can show y’all to your rooms,” Fred said with a sweet smile.

“Come to the office, I’ll show you to the books you’ll find most helpful,” Wesley told Willow and Giles. ”I have more at my apartment. If you need, I can stop by there and pick them up.”

“Yes, indeed, that would be greatly appreciated, thank you Wesley,” said Giles.

“Hold on! Who said that you all can stay here? I was about to pack up and shut this place down, because I have a penthouse at the law firm. Not to mention how can you be so sure they will let us use their supplies and equipment on Spike,” expressed Angel with much agitation.

Buffy was sitting on the edge of the couch, quietly telling Spike their plan, while awaiting Fred’s return, when Angel decided to open his mouth. Like a mask, anger slid over Buffy’s face as she stood from her perch on the couch and then slowly walked over to Angel in full Slayer mode. “Are you suggesting we leave? That you’re not going to help? We just saved the world! Ended, yet another, apocalypse and you’re throwing us out! Seriously?” As she spoke she became louder and her eyes burned with the need for violence.

Angel, becoming fearful for his life, raised his hands up in surrender and slowly backed away from the small, furious Slayer. He backed up so far that he bumped into the circular settee couch, located in the middle of the lobby. Deciding it would be best to use the furniture to create distance between Buffy and himself, Angel moved to the other side of the couch. He then started to back-peddle from his last outburst. “No, that’s not what I’m saying at all, Buffy. There is plenty of room here for everyone. I was just saying that Wolfram and Hart might not want to help a gang of slayers and their unconscious vampire. They may not let us use their resources. That’s all I was trying to say,” Angel said, in an attempt to appease Buffy.

“Angel, how would you shut down the hotel when I still live here?” Fred asked with an annoyed frown. “Plus, you’re the boss over there now. If they said no it would be because you said no. Spike is your family and we help family around here! How dare you Angel,” reprimanded the small Texan.

“I’m sorry Fred. You’re right, of course we will help,” Angel confirmed with a forced, tight voice and even tighter smile. Buffy pinned him to his spot for a moment with her glare and then turned to Fred and thanked her.

“I got the keys if y’all want to come on up to your rooms,” Fred informed the Sunnydale group. She leaned toward Buffy and whispered with a sweet smile and a wink, “I’ll give you and Spike the best room with the biggest bed since y’all are gunna need it once we get him to wake up.” She straightened back up and announced, “Grab all y’all’s things, here we go.” Fred turned and headed to the set of stairs to the right of the lobby.

Buffy looked over to Xander and sighed. “Yay! More stairs. You good to help again or do you need a rest? I know he is pretty heavy.”

“No, I’m good, but let’s try carrying him differently this time. It might be easier if we both put one of his arms over our shoulder and Weekend at Bernies him up the stairs. What do you think?”

“That sounds fine, as long as you don’t put him in another of your Hawaiian shirts again. He would never forgive me,” Buffy said light-heartedly, a goofy smile on her face.

Together, they were able to get Spike up and with an arm over each of there shoulders, putting their arms around his middle for support. “Actually, Bernie wore a grey and white striped shirt and a blue wind breaker. Your thinking about Andrew McCarthy’s character, Larry, he the one with the Hawaiian shirt,” corrected Xander, as they slowly made their way to the staircase.

“Well, then I guess that makes you Larry, in this situation. Though, we should avoid blue wind-breakers when dressing Spike, as I’m pretty sure his feelings on that would be similar to that of the Hawaiian shirt,” Buffy said with a laugh while they took each step, one at a time. Once they had accomplished the task of getting Spike to the top of the stairs they caught up with Fred and the rest of the group.

“Buffy, I’m sure glad y’all were able to Spike up here, sorry there is no elevator,” said Fred, before handing a set of keys to Buffy. “Spike and your room is the last one at the end of the hall. It’s really pretty in there, I hope you like it!”

“I’m sure that I’ll love it. Thank you again, for standing up to Angel for us and having our backs down there. That was really great of you and it means a lot to me.”

“Well, to be honest. I’m a sucker for a great love story and I really want to see how this one turns out,” Fred said with a giggle. “Plus, from what I heard, Spike seems like a pretty decent guy. So I have no need not to help him. I mean, any guy who willingly goes into battle, knowing it means he is going to die, but still does it to save the world, is worth it,” she finished, with a sincere small.

“Yeah, he has his moments,” Buffy confirm with smile of her own.

Fred then gave Xander his own key and informed him that she gave the copy to man with the blond hair, “Oh goodie, I get to bunk with the nerd king,” gripped Xander, as they headed toward Buffy and Spike’s room.

“Hey, at least you have someone to talk to. My bunk mate has nothing to say,” said Buffy, trying to lightly joke about the situation.

“I’m glad to see you trying to take Spike’s condition light- heartedly. We will figure it out and I don’t want you to beat yourself up over it. You’re doing your best. When he wakes up he will be really thankful for all your doing for him. That and he will love to hear about to you chewing out Angel,” said Xander.

Upon reaching the room’s entrance, Buffy shifted Spike’s weight on her shoulder and unlocked door, then threw it open. It really was beautiful. Buffy and Xander quickly shuffled Spike across the room to the bed and sat him on the edge and then lowered his back down and onto the bed, with his knees hanging off the side.

Both Buffy and Xander stepped back and stretched and rolled their shoulders. They stood there in silence for a moment then suddenly Buffy turned and caught Xander in a surprise hug. “Thank you for everything you’ve done for us today. You could have easily gotten upset that Spike was returned. I’m so sorry about Anya. I know how bad it hurts to loss the person you love and I know your putting on a strong face, but I want you to know I want to be there for you like you have been for me and Spike.” Buffy gave him one last squeeze before dropping her arms and stepping back.

Xander gave Buffy a watery smile. “Thanks Buff. I appreciate that. I feel like I’ve gotten a lot of things wrong, regarding our friendship, in the last couple of year. I just want to start fresh.”

“That sounds like a great idea,” agreed Buffy. “Hey, I know you probably tired, but can you do me one more favor?” she asked.

“Sure thing, at your service. What can I do?”

“I would really like to jump into the shower and wash some of this grim off,” Buffy said looking down at the dirt and blood covering her body. “I was wondering if you would mind sitting in here with Spike until I’m done. I really don’t want to leave an opening for Angel to remedy the Spike situation, if you get what I mean. I don’t think he would, or at least I hope he wouldn’t, but I just don’t want to give him the opportunity.”

“Yeah, I get that. Enjoy you shower. I’ll play guard,” Xander said as he made himself comfortable in an armchair. Buffy thanked him once again, and then disappeared behind the bathroom door.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters fully belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Twentieth Century Fox. I only borrowed the characters for nonprofit entertainment! I do not own the premise of the show or sadly, any of the characters. This was written without any copywriter infringement intended.
> 
>  
> 
> I would like to give a huge thanks to my beta Sunalso.

Chapter 5

Following the quiet click of the bathroom door, Buffy switched on the light, causing her to squint do to the sudden brightness. She leaned her back against the door and sighed as her body sagged with exhaustion. Buffy closed her eyes and took five deep, slow calming breaths before engaging the lock and pushing herself off the door. 

Opening her eyes, Buffy walked over to the sink and turned on the facet and bent to gulp the cool water. When her once empty stomach felt full and sloshy, she straightened her back and looked at herself in the mirror. She had definitely looked better. If fact, she looked like death warmed over. Her hair and face were both in disarray, both dingy and caked with blood and dirt. Her eyes clearly expressed her sadness and fatigue.

Releasing another sigh, Buffy looked away from her reflection and turned off the sink’s tap. Moving toward the shower, she removed her shirt and tossed to the floor, before reaching pass the curtain to start the flow of water. Buffy, kicked off her boots and popped open the fastenings of her pants, shimmying them down her legs and kicked them to the side.

The sound of the running water made Buffy very aware that she had not used the restroom since before the battle, so she decided to quickly relieve herself before getting into the shower. Once she was finished, she retrieved a wash cloth from the shelf above the toilet and went to test the temperature of the water. Discarding her socks and underwear onto the growing heap on the floor, Buffy slipped into the shower and stood, unmoving, beneath the hot, steaming spray for several moments. It was not long before her shoulders began to tremor. Soon transformed into intense shaking as she started to sob the stress of the last couple days from her body. She allowed herself, in this moment of solitude, a quick reprieve. Buffy felt like she could openly grieve everything she had lost today. Her home, belongings, some friends, and mother’s grave were all gone.

However, it was the loss of Spike and his subsequent return that made her the most uncomfortable. of her didn’t quite trust it, as though she was waiting for the other shoe to drop. She was worried that she would blink or turn away only to find the he had disappeared. But it was his uncharacteristic stillness that scared her the most. Spike has always had an almost uncontainable energy about him and this unrelenting pause unnerved her. He reminded her too much of her mother, when Buffy had found her on the living room couch. She really needed to find a way to pull Spike out of this odd state that he was in but she feared that she would never find a way.

Buffy leaned her forehead against the shower’s tile wall. Its coolness reminded her of Spike’s skin and she flattened her palms and chest to the wall as well. The wonderful contrast between the cool tile and warm water hitting her back caused Buffy to gasp. Closing her eyes, she let the sensation momentarily distracted from her sorrows.

Buffy nuzzled the wall with her cheek once more before pulling herself upright and wiping tears from eyes. She then gave herself a full body shake to get herself ready to face the world. Once she was done collecting herself, Buffy quickly completed her shower and turned off the tap. 

As she was wrapping herself in her towel, Buffy regarded the filthy pile of clothes on the floor with a pout. She realized that she had forgotten to grab her bag when leaving the bus. Buffy scurried to the bathroom door and cracked it open and called out, “Hey, Xander. I’m done in here, so if you want to head out you’re totally free to go, but can you see if Dawn can run down to the bus and get Spike and my bags? I seem to overlook after-shower clothing and you couldn’t pay me to put what I was wearing back on, cause…ewww.”

Xander chuckled, “Yeah, sure thing. I’ll find her then go get some rest. Night Buffy. I’ll see you in the morning,” he said as he got up to take his leave.

“Night Xander. You sleep well too and I’ll see you then,” Buffy said. She then peeked through the crack just in time see Xander pause at the closet door and reach in to pull out a robe.

“Guess who’s the luckiest girl!” Xander popped his hand through the crack in the door, revealing an elegant, floor length, 50’s style satin robe.

“Oh, wow! That’s really fancy… where do you think it came from?” asked Buffy, as she took the robe.

“Beats me, but it looks really old. Someone probably left it behind. Still in good condition though and can do the job until Dawn gets your bags. Anyway, I’ll see you tomorrow,” Xander called as he made his departure.

When Buffy heard the click of the closing door she peeked out of the bathroom once more, and when she saw the coast was clear, stepped out into the room. She held up the robe and appreciated the silky texture. A giggle bubbled from her mouth when she realized that it was Spike’s favorite color and Buffy was pretty sure that he would die happy if he were able to see her in it. “Well, you’re just going to have to wake up mister,” Buffy said to Spike as she dropped her towel and slid the robe’s soft, cool materiel onto her body and tied the belt around her waist. Buffy turned to look into the mirror on the other side of the room. Other then it being way too long and collecting on the floor around her feet, the robe was a perfect fit. Definitely a keeper. Turning to Spike once more, Buffy struck a pose and asked, “What ‘da think?” When he remained silent, like she expected him to, she pouted and said in a deadpan voice, “just what I thought… speechless.”

Buffy shrugged her shoulders and walked over to Spike to straighten him on the bed. She climbed up onto the bed and stood over him with one foot on either side of him. “You would really be enjoying this. I can almost hear all your dirty little innuendos,” she told him with a smirk that would rival his own. Bending down, Buffy hooked her arms under his armpits and shifted his torso so it was going in the right direction along the bed. As she stood up straight, the door to the room flew open, causing Buffy to jump. Standing in the doorway was a wide-eyed Dawn. Her arms were full with both bags and what looked to be a first aid kit.

“Omg, Buffy! What are you doing to him, freak! Don’t you think he should be awake for that… or at least recognizable?” Dawn asked, scrunching up her face.

Buffy rolled her eyes and hoped down from the bed. “I was moving him, Dawn. Get your mind out of the gutter,” Buffy said, turning her back to her sister so she could lift Spike’s legs onto the bed. All the while, she had a secretive smirk on her face since her mind hadn’t been too far from the gutter only moments before.

“Oh,” said Dawn with a nervous laugh. “I got your bags and Fred gave me a first aid kit. She said there might be some burn ointment in there,” Dawn said. Dawn then placed the bags on the floor by the door and the first aid kit on the night stand. “Where did you get the pretty bathrobe?” She asked, reaching out to touch the sleeve.

“Do you like it? Xander found it in the closet. Oh, and thanks for grabbing our stuff.” Buffy grunted as she yanked off Spike’s boot.

“It’s always so weird to see him without his boots,” Dawn commented. “It actually makes him more approachable in a way.”

Buffy listened to her sister and finished removing his boots and then started to slide his arms out of the duster’s sleeves. “You seem to have given his feet an abnormal amount of thought,” Buffy teased. “Though he does have really nice feet for a guy who has been walking around for as long as he has.”

Dawn laughed. “You remember when he used to paint his nails all the time?” she asked. “Well, I use to always wonder if he painted his toes too.”

Buffy froze and made a thoughtful face which suddenly melted into a grin as a loud, unladylike laugh burst its way out of her. She had never considered it, but the mental image alone had Buffy hunched over the bed laughing so hard she could barely breath.

Dawn just stood there smiling and watching her sister in shock. “Buffy, you ok?”

Buffy wiped away her tears of laughter and cleared her throat “Yeah, I’m sorry… ha, wow. I just got the mental image of Spike waddling around his crypt with those toe separators. Thanks Dawn, I really needed that laugh,” explained Buffy.

“Don’t mention it,” said Dawn, with a shrug. “That’s what I’m here for. But I’m also willing to give you a hand. What can I do?” She asked, stepping closer to Spike.

“That would actually be really great. I want to get his coat off him but I don’t want to damage it. He would probably kill me, no matter how much he loves me. So when I roll him toward me, pull his coat out from under him,” instructed Buffy.

“Gotcha,” replied her sister, readying herself.

Buffy leaned over Spike and grabbed his shoulder and hip closest to Dawn and rolled him in her direction with ease. Dawn quickly reached under him and collected the duster. Buffy then gently lowered him back down to his previous position.

When she looked up her younger sister, Dawn was hugging the jacket close to her chest and looking upset. Furrowing her brow, Buffy asked, “Dawnie, are you ok?”

Dawn looked at her sister with sad eyes. “I’m ok. Just kinda of worried. I thought the blood would work,” Dawn paused for a moment, sighed and continued, “I said some pretty mean things to him. We used to be really close and what he did really hurt me. I never got to tell him that I forgave him or that I was sorry.” Dawn looked down with guilty expression on her face.

“He really cares about you Dawn. I’m sure he understood why you were mad and I’m sure he forgives you for whatever it is you said. You’ll always be his Niblet, you know that,” Buffy said while she came around the bed and stood in front of her sister.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I just wish I would have found the time to clear the air. But, it’s more than the Spike thing that’s bothering me.” Dawn swallowed hard and continued, “I want to tell you I’m really sorry for kicking you out of the house. We haven’t talked about it, but I just wanted you to know that I was in the wrong. I had no right Buffy. I’ve never meet anyone more amazing then you and I completely abandoned you when you needed me the most. I’m so, so sorry!” By the time Dawn had finished, her voice was cracking and she had giant tears rolling down her face.

Buffy quickly pulled her younger sister into a tight hug and started to rock her back and forth. “Shhh, it’s ok Dawn. Shhh,” said Buffy as she tried to console her sister. After a short moment, her sobs had slowed down into hiccups and Buffy pulled back to wipe Dawn’s face. “I forgave you a long time ago for that. It was a stressful time. People had gotten hurt and died. You did what you thought is best. I know you weren’t trying to hurt me. Sometimes we lose hope and make the wrong decision, but that’s a part of growing up. In the end, we were able to pull together and make it work. I love you Dawn, and we are family. Families sometimes hurt each other. I’m sure there has been many times I hurt you, but we always make it right. We are all we have left. So yes, we’re good. I love and forgive you,” Buffy said with a sweet reassuring smile. She leaned in and gave her sister a kiss on the forehead.

“Thank you,” Dawn said in a low voice gave her sister another hug before stepping back. She then awkwardly laughed and handed Spike’s jacket to Buffy. “You probably want this.”

“Yes ma’am, I do.” Buffy lifted the jacket to her nose and inhaled the familiar sent that was Spike and then draped the coat over the back of a chair.

“Is there anything else I can help you with?” asked Dawn.

“No not really. I’m just going to try and wash off his face a little bit and then see if I can get his shirt changed. I’m also kinda tired so I figured I’d just go to bed after and just start new tomorrow. You should probably get some rest too, young lady.”

“Ok, well I’m two doors down so just let me know if something comes up. Good night Buffy, I love you.” Dawn headed to the door and opened it. “Thank you, Buffy,” she said before slipping out of the bedroom.

“Night! Love you too” called Buffy to her sister’s retreating form.

Now alone, Buffy walked around the room collecting the supplies needed to tend to Spike. All the while, she casually talked to the vampire as though he was conscious. “Time to get you ready for bed. We should get you cleaned up first. What do you say? Nothing like a quick sponge bath before bed!” Buffy filled an ice bucket with warm water and grabbed a couple clean wash cloths and towels and placed them on the bedside table next to the first aid kit. She then walked over to the door and collected both their bags and deposited then onto the foot of the bed. “Nurse Buffy, at your service,” she said in a low voice as she sat on the edge of the bed next to him.

Grabbing and wetting a wash cloth, Buffy started to gently wash the top of Spike’s head. That this moment, she was very thankful for Spike’s pre-battle blood binge. Either he had some unknown foresight that he was going to need the extra blood or he was just nervous eating. But either way, he had healed enough that his features were now somewhat recognizable. The oozing, blackened blisters that had been covering his face were gone leaving his skin tightly drawn across his bone structure with a shiny, bright pink appearance. “Don’t worry I still think you’re handsome. Who could have known someone without a reflection could be so vain? “Buffy giggled and leaned over to kiss his hairless brow. When Buffy finished cleaning his head and neck, she went to the sink to pour out the dingy water and replace it with fresh water.

Moving back to the bed, she removed his shirt by tearing it down the middle. “I sure hope you thought to pack more of these.” Buffy continued to clean Spike’s chest, back, torso, and arms. Every once in a while, she would softly kiss spots of his body she has always secretly admired. Like where his neck and shoulders met, the spot right above the crook of his elbow, and on his chest right over his heart. When she finished washing his hands she kissed his wide palm and then cupped her cheek with it, like he had done so many times before. “Please wake up… I’m still not ready for you to be gone,” she whispered sadly and, with a sigh, she gently placed his hand back on the bed.

Buffy, now in a much more sullen mood, brought the dirty water and wash cloths to the sink and then returned and applied some burn cream to the more severe areas of Spike’s face. After she was done, she then turned to the bags at the end of the bed and opened hers first, to retrieve underwear and pajamas for the night. Once she was changed she moved her bag to the floor and set her sights on Spike’s bag. When she opened his duffel to get him a clean shirt, she noticed a folded piece of paper with her name scrawled across the front in his elegant handwriting.

Swallowing back a lump in her throat, Buffy reached out with a shaky hand and picked up the note. As she slowly opened it, Buffy perched herself on the edge of the bed once more, only thing time with her back to the vampire. As she started to read Spike’s last words to her, she had to rapidly blink to keep tears from blurring her vision.

Dear Buffy,

Thank you for believing in me and giving me your trust. It has meant the world to me, pet. You've helped me believe in myself. That I could be a good man and you gave me that chance. So thank you.

I’m pretty sure that I’m not going to be walking out of this one, luv. That amulet isn’t going to let me live. I can just feel it. But hopefully it will just the thing we need to save the day and I can go out with a bang.

Take care of Niblet. She is becoming a beautiful woman that any bloke should thank their lucky stars that she is even in the same room with them. She is quite bright as well, so don’t let her get away without going to Uni. Also, can you tell her I’m sorry I mucked it all up, that I will always love her like she was my little sister.

I love you Buffy. I always will. I want you to be happy and enjoy your life. If Willow is able to make a bunch of little Slayers and you make it out of this, you should go on hiatus. Get to know yourself and see the world. Find love and live your life. Maybe even try going back to Uni yourself . If anyone deserves it, it’s you, pet.

Thank you for letting me be your champion.

Love always,  
William Pratt

Buffy closed the now tear-stained letter and placed on the bed next to her. Wiping her eyes, she turned around and then crawled over Spike’s body and laid down on the bed next to him. She positioned herself so her head rested on his shoulder and pulled his arm around her. She then hooked her leg over his hip and placed her hand on his chest over his heart. “I don’t need to find love… I’ve had it all along. I’m sorry I never showed you before it was too late. I love you too, William.” Buffy cried silently, nestled against Spike, until sleep finally found her.

****Four hours later****

Buffy was startled awake by banging on her hotel door. “Jeesh, I’m coming! Hold on!” Buffy called out as she climbed clumsily over Spike and sleepily walked to the door. When she opened it, she found a very excited Willow on the other side. “Hey, what’s going on?” Buffy asked in a gravelly voice, squinting from the hall light.

“I think I found something!”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters fully belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Twentieth Century Fox. I only borrowed the characters for nonprofit entertainment! I do not own the premise of the show or sadly, any of the characters. This was written without any copywriter infringement intended.
> 
>  
> 
> I would like to give a huge thanks to my beta Sunalso.

Chapter 6

Buffy ushered the redhead into the room and shut the door behind her. “What did you find out? Is it good news? Please say it’s good news,” pleaded Buffy. When her friend didn’t answer right away, she followed Willow’s line of sight, which landed on Spike’s prone body. “Um…Willow? What is it? You’re starting to scare me…” Buffy said, nervously.

Willow shook herself from her daze. “Sorry, Buffy. I’m still so surprised by how much he has changed since the first time we meet him. You know, when he was all “grrr!” Willow said, mimicking claws with her hands. “He has come really far, and we sure didn’t make it easy on him. So I’m pretty impressed. Oh, and hey, he looks like he may have healed some, so that’s really great!”

“Yeah, luckily he hoovered several bags of blood before the battle. He said som-“ Buffy started to explain, when she was interrupted by a knock on the door. Walking to the door she asked, “expecting someone?”

“I may have forgotten to mention that Giles is on his way up,” said Willow.

“Hey, come on in,” welcomed Buffy, opening the door for her Watcher. Giles greeted the girls and placed a stack of books on the table. Shutting the door, Buffy walked over to Spike’s bag and fished out one of his clean shirts and wrestled it onto the vampire. “So what did you find?” asked Buffy, as she finished and sat on the edge of the bed.

Giles smiled at Buffy. “We believe we have stumbled across some information regarding the amulet.”

“Ok…so, what does it do? Where is it from? Is it evil?” asked Buffy. 

“Well, it’s origin is unknown, but it’s really old. Maybe even as old as your scythe, Buffy. We haven’t really found anything indicating evilness either, but you never know. As for its use, challenging and cleansing rituals, but it also works like container or sealant. The translation was a little iffy,” explained Willow.

Wrinkling her brow in confusion, Buffy asked, “Ok, so what does it contain or seal and how does this help us with Spike?”

“Unfortunately, that is where things became, as Willow said, “iffy”. For all we know, the amulet could hold something within it or seal it up in a different location,” offered Giles.

“Something? As in Spike? Are you trying to tell me he may be trapped in the amulet under the crumbled town of Sunnydale?” Buffy asked. She was becoming agitated with all the maybes and non-answers.

“Um, well…yes,” confirmed Giles. Picking up on Buffy’s distress, he pulled off his glasses and began to clean them with a cloth. “He could also be trapped or sealed in his own psyche. We should be able to easily reverse something like that.”

“Yeah, Buffy, I was thinking that maybe I could do a spell. You know, like the one I did with you after Glory took Dawn. Kinda go on a walkabout in Spike’s head. See if I can contact him. If he is somehow sealed inside his subconscious I may be able to pull him out,” said Willow with an encouraging smile.

Buffy worried her lip in thought.

“Buffy….” said Giles.

“How do we know Willow won’t get stuck in Spike’s head too?” asked Buffy.

“I can’t guarantee it, but I’m pretty sure it doesn’t work that way. I mean the amulet is nowhere near by,” Willow reassured.

“Okay… how long will it take and do we have everything that we need?

“I asked Wesley to pick up the candles I”ll need. He will probably be back in an hour, so we can get started then,” said Willow.

“I will continue to do research. I believe that Wesley said he would also bring some of his books from home. It would be in Spike’s best interest if we found a way to locate and obtain the amulet from the rubble,” Giles informed the girls, as he turned to make his exit.

“Giles!” Buffy called out.

He turned at the door and gave Buffy a fatherly smile.

“I just wanted to say thanks for everything you’re doing. I know Spike has never been your favorite person, but it really means a lot to me,” said Buffy.

Giles smiled at Buffy with a slight blush. “You’re very welcome.” He nodded awkwardly to the girls and let himself out.

“Is there anything I can do to help you prepare?” Buffy asked Willow, hoping the witch would give her a way to distract herself. 

Buffy was nervous about the spell and what it would tell them. She was worried that if he was trapped, Willow would not be able to break him free. And on the other hand, what if Willow did get him out and he was mad at her or didn’t want anything to do with her?

“If you keep chewing at that lip like that there be nothing left for him to enjoy when he wakes up,” said Willow with a wink. “What’s wrong? I thought you would be excited for snuggles.”

“I am it’s just…. I don’t know. What if he wakes up and doesn’t want anything to do with me,” Buffy said quietly.

“Why would you think something like that?”

Buffy was quiet for a moment before she took a deep breath and explained, “When we were down in the Hellmouth and the amulet was doing its light show, I realized that it was going to kill him so I panicked and told him that I loved him.”

“Oh…well, I don’t see why that would mean he wouldn’t want anything to do with you. Buffy, Spike loves you. If anything…” Willow stopped when Buffy mumbled something so quietly only dogs and the undead would have been able to hear it. “What was that?” She asked.

Buffy sighed and looked up at her friend from beneath her lashes and repeated, “He didn’t believe me… he said that I didn’t love him and then thanked me for saying it. Maybe he was just trying to get me to leave, but I really wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t believe me. I have said and done some pretty horrible things to him. I used him and told him he meant nothing to me. That he was beneath me. Truthfully though, I first realized it was possible to love him after Glory kidnapped him. What he did for Dawn….” Buffy looked down at her hands as she played with a loose string in her night shirt before she continued. “I saw the kind of man he could be. I was in love with him by time I jumped off the tower. If we had both made it through I was going to talk to him. Then I died and came back. Everything just got so confusing and screwed up after that. I was angry and depressed and I took it out on him because he would let me. Not exactly something you do to someone you love… so I’m worried he will be mad. That he will think I was just messing with him. Getting in one more shot before he died,” Buffy finished quietly. When Willow didn’t respond, Buffy looked up at her friend, expecting to see disgust or judgment. Instead, Willow looked amused. “What?” Buffy asked with a pout.

“Somehow, I think Spike has forgiven you for all that. I mean you both made mistakes and he is in no way an innocent party. We both know why he got a soul for you.”

“Willow…”

“Hey, I’m not judgment girl! What he did was pretty bad, but I’ve done things in my relationship with Tara that were almost as horrific and to this day still make me shudder. Things get out of hand and people make bad choices, but it’s what you do afterwards. How you handle those poor choices. That was a hard lesson for me to learn, but Spike, he got it. I’d say getting a soul was a pretty great way for him to handle it. Just the fact that without a soul he felt bad enough that he chose to get a soul is impressive.” Willow explained. When Buffy didn’t replay Willow continued, “Hey, even if he didn’t believe you, Buffy, he will when he wakes up to see how hard you were trying to get him back. So don’t worry, everything will be ok.”

Buffy drew in a deep breath and held it in for a moment then blew it out with force. She nodded her head in agreement, “Your right, Wills. I’m being really silly. I just feel like I’m all over the place.”

“It will get better,” Willow said with a smile.

“Ok, so again I ask: what can I do to help you?” Buffy asked, with a much lighter heart.

“Hmmm, well lets first get him scooted over to side of the bed. I don’t wait to have to lay on top of him or anything,” said Willow.

Buffy was halfway to the bed when she stopped and looked at Willow with a funny expression. “Wait, what? Why are you lying down with him. I thought you did the crazy mind- meld thing with me sitting across from me? Are you using the same spell?”

“It’s not so much a spell then it is a meditation, but it’s the same one. It’s just that you were sitting up with your eyes open. All I had to do was look into your eyes and concentrate. Spike isn’t even conscious so I have to do it a little differently. I’m going to lay down next to him and link our hands then go into a kind of sleep trance myself. Don’t worry he’s not my type. I promise not to get handsy,” Willow said with a giggle.

“What? I wasn’t jealous!” Buffy laughed, poking her friend.

“You so were,” accused Willow good naturally.

“Whatever,” Buffy said smiling and her friend. She quickly moved Spike over and asked, “Is there anything else I can do to help?”

“There is one thing you can do for me. Go downstairs and get something to eat. I know your worried about Spike, but you can’t let that stop you from taking care of yourself,” said Willow.

Buffy started to protest, but was interrupted by her friend. “No excuses, I’ll stay here with him while you’re gone, resolve face,” said Willow, pointing to her face.

“Ok, fine I’ll go. I won’t be long. Oh, and don’t let Angel in. I don’t trust him not to stake Spike. Thanks, Will,” Buffy said as she exited the room.

*****

An hour later, after eating a sandwich and chips, Buffy found herself back in her room with Spike and Willow. She sat with her back against the head board and ran her fingers along the short, dark stubble growing on the top of Spike’s head. All the while, she watched Willow move silently through the room setting up and lighting the candles Wesley had picked up. When the wicca finished, she walked to the middle of the room and turned toward Buffy.

“How long does this usually take?” asked Buffy, slipping off the bed and switching off the side table lamps.

“It will depend. If I get in his mind and he is really sealed in there, it may take a couple hours. Or it could be really easily and take no time at all,” explained Willow.

“How long is too long? When should we worry about you being trapped?” asked Buffy.

“Any longer than 12 hours and you can get concerned, but I really doubt that will happen,” Willow said, trying to reassure the Slayer.

Buffy walked over her friend and pulled her into a big hug. Willow giggled and asked, “What’s this for?”

“It’s just a thank you. I know you must be tired, but you’re still trying your hardest to get him back to me. I really appreciate that. It means a lot,” said Buffy. She pulled back from the hug when there was a knock on the door. Buffy walked over and open it to find Xander, Giles, and Dawn on the other side. “Hey guys, what’s up?” She asked, kind of confused.

“We thought we would come to give morale support and good vibes,” answered Xander with a goofy smile.

Buffy felt Willow walk up behind her and pushed the door further open. “That really sweet Xander, but other than Buffy and maybe, Giles, I will need to have a limited amount of people. This requires complete silence and concentration on my part. The smallest noise could pull me out of trance. I’m sorry,” Willow said sincerely.

“Ok, but you will let us know when your done right? When he wakes up?” asked Dawn.

“Of course, Dawn. I’ll let you know. He’ll be dying to see you,” promised Buffy.

“So when do the festivities begin?” asked Xander.

“I’m all set up, so we will probably start in a couple of minutes. Giles, would you like to come in and join me and Buffy? You have some experience in magics and are better able to pick up if something is going wonky,” said Willow.

“Yes, of course. That’s a wonderful idea,” said Giles as he slipped into the room.

“Well, I guess I’ll see you guys in a couple of hours. Keep your fingers crossed!” said Buffy, before leaning forward to give both her sister and friend a quick hug. They said their good byes and Buffy shut the door.

Turning to Willow, Buffy asked, “Where should we sit?”

“Anywhere, but the bed will do. Will you turn the rest of the lights off for me first?” asked Willow.

“Of course,” said Buffy as she complied and then took a seat on the far side of the room at a dining table.

She watched as Willow removed her shoes and slipped onto the bed next to Spike. She then linked her fingers with his and closed her eyes. “Remember, you both need to be as quiet as possible. I’m going to start now,” Willow reminded before pulling in slow deep breaths through her nose and then pushing them out through her mouth.

Buffy settled further into her chair and started to zone out while Willow did her breathing meditation. She was pulled from her thoughts when Willow suddenly became still. She quickly looked over to Giles to see if he was concerned but soon relaxed when he gave her a reassuring smile. Buffy decided to just close her eyes and think positive thoughts.

About thirty minutes in, Buffy was starting to fall asleep when Willow started to make groaning noises while her face became pinched and her eyes leaked tears. Buffy became alarmed when Giles stiffened and sat up straighter with his gaze set firmly on her friend. She wanted to say something, ask him if everything was ok, but she remembered Willow’s warning and didn’t want to pull her out if she was trying to break Spike loose. Her gaze shifted over to the vampire to find that while her friend seemed to be trapped in turmoil, he still lay perfectly still and unaffected.

Buffy was suddenly startled when Willow shot up from the bed gasping for air. Giles jumped up, filled a glass with water, and brought it over to Willow. Buffy walked quickly over to the bed. Not only did Willow still seem to be in distress, but Spike clearly continued to be in an unconscious state.

Buffy looked back at Willow when she heard her friend try to speak. “Are you ok Will?”

“I’m sorry Buffy… I can’t… there is nothing there… just cold and darkness… I’m sorry,” Willow said, trying to catch her breath.

Buffy’s eyes became round and wet as she slowly turned and sat on the edge of the bed. There was nothing there. He was just a body. Where was her Spike? The man she fell in love with. Where was his demon? At that thought, Buffy jumped up and spun around to look at Willow, “His demon, it has to still be in there or he would just be a corpse. He would not have caught on fire and he wouldn’t be healing.”

Now breathing steady and better pulled together, Willow smiled sadly. “I could sense something there with me, but it was dormant. I couldn’t contact it if I had wanted to. I could feel it’s pain, though. It felt like loss…” she explained.

Buffy reached for Spikes hand and tears rolled down her face as she gazed at him. “Now what?” She asked, in quiet scratchy voice.

“I think we should go to the crater and locate the amulet,” said Giles, causing both girls to look at him. “I’ve been looking through some of Wesley’s books and I found a spell that will let you visualize an object that you want or need and it will be teleported to you. You do have to be near its location, however. I think this would be our most logical next step.”

Buffy straighten her back, refocusing and nodded her head in agreement. “So another road trip it is.”

“I agree, sounds like a plan, but I would like to clean up and eat before we head out. I can rest on the way. Giles can you show me the spell so I can collect what I need and can prepare?” asked Willow.

“Yes, of course, and Buffy you should find someone to sit with Spike as I think it would be a bit cumbersome to bring him along,” said Giles.

“As much as I don’t want to leave him, I kinda have to agree. I’ll talk to Xander and Fred and see if they will take turns. I also want to see if Fred had come up with a way to feed him. His pre- battle blood will only last for so long. You do what you need to do, Will, and let me know if you need anything,” said Buffy.

“Very good, let’s all get ourselves together and meet downstairs in the lobby in three hours,” instructed Giles.

With that they all parted to prepare themselves for another long trip to Sunnydale.

Meanwhile, in Sunnydale

Whistler stood on the edge of the crater, swinging the amulet in front of him. “This is your last chance big guy. The fork in the road. Hope you make the right choice and turn it around. If you don’t, you won’t just be losing the girl.”

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters fully belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Twentieth Century Fox. I only borrowed the characters for nonprofit entertainment! I do not own the premise of the show or sadly, any of the characters. This was written without any copywriter infringement intended.
> 
>  
> 
> I would like to give a huge thanks to my beta Sunalso.

Chapter 7

Buffy watched the quickly passing scenery as it flew by the rental car’s front passenger window. The ride back to Sunnydale seemed to be taking much longer then the ride to L.A. Buffy was not sure if it was due to the fact that she had been awake for most of the travel this time or if it was the overwhelming anxiety of being so far away from Spike. She knew he was safe and in good hands as she’d been able to get Xander and Dawn to agree to take turns watching over Spike. She’d also been able to get Fred to promise to keep Angel at a distance. It was just that she was feeling the same pull to L.A. that she had right before Spike appeared at the edge of the crater. It was causing an ache in her stomach and the healed burn on her left hand was tingling.

“Are you hungry?” Giles quietly asked, pulling Buffy from her silent introspection.

“Umm, no… not really, but thank you,” Buffy replied dismissively, turning back to the window. The car was once again filled with nothing but the sound of the tires on the road.

After about five minutes of silence, Giles cleared his throat and asked, “Is everything alright Buffy? You seem to be at odds with something.”

Looking back at her watcher, Buffy just shrugged her shoulders and rubbed her left hand on her pant leg. “I guess I’m just a little anxious.”

“Yes, quite…just a little,” Giles said, giving Buffy a pointed look.

With a slow smile and a low airy laugh, Buffy replied, “Yeah, ok. So maybe I’m a lot anxious. It’s weird. I don’t know how to explain it really. It happened earlier as we were driving away from Sunnydale. My hand started to tingle and itch and I had this horrible pain in the pit of my stomach. It went away once we retrieved Spike, but before that I felt like I had to stay there. That I shouldn’t leave. Anyway, it started back up once we crossed the L.A. border. It’s like the further I get from Spike the worse it feels.”

“Your hand is tingling? That is quite odd. Is there any reason that you can think of that could cause that to happen?

“Well, when we were down in the hellmouth, after the amulet activated, I reached over and held Spike’s hand and when our fingers linked, they caught fire. It was the oddest thing, Giles. It didn’t even hurt. I mean it stung, but that was it and there was this feeling of connection like I have never felt before. Almost as if something was flowing between us. When I let go the sensation was gone. At least that’s what it felt like to me. I don’t know how it was on his end. I mean, he didn’t even believe me when I told him how I felt. I could feel him. His love for me, his regret, remorse, and his fear…. I guess he couldn’t feel me. Maybe I’m looking for something that isn’t there and it’s just itchy from healing,” said Buffy, looking down at her scared hand.

“Perhaps we can look into it further. We have found many sources on the amulet and we already know it can be used for channeling purposes,” Giles said.

“I don’t know… I guess.”

“Buffy, if you say you felt something I believe you. Have you perhaps considered that the fear you felt from him was for your wellbeing? What would you have done if he’d acknowledge your feelings in the way you had hoped? Would you have gotten out in time? I can’t believe that I’m going to say this, but Spike is much more intelligent then he lets on and I’m quite certain that he knew the longer you where down there, the less likely your chances of survival. I would bet my best bottle of bourbon that he believed you and said what he had to say to get you to leave.”

“Ok, I will consider that as a possibility, but seeing as how your best bottle is buried beneath Sunnydale along with my boyfriend’s consciousness, maybe you shouldn’t be making bets. Oh, maybe we should get Willow to materialize that as too,” said Buffy smiling widely as she poked Giles’ arm. She looked over her shoulder and into the backseat to check on Willow. She was sleeping soundly with a blanket tucked under her chin and a pillow that was wedged between her head and the rear driver- side window. Buffy’s smile softened as she turned back around in her seat.

“You should try and get some sleep yourself, Buffy,” said Giles. “We’re only about halfway there and once we arrive it may take a couple hours before we’ll be heading back. Sleep may even help you get past the anxiety you’re experiencing.”

“I don’t know if I could fall asleep even if I wanted to. I guess I could try.”

“We can put something soothing on the radio, that may help you relax.”

“Ok, sure,” agreed Buffy as she reclined her seat.

Giles turned the radio on with the car’s steering wheel controls and started to flip through the stations.

“Stop! Right there,” said Buffy, as he passed by a news report.

“News? Really? I never pegged you for an NPR listener,” stated Giles with surprise.

“Oh, no. I’m not. It’s just so boring that it’s sure to put me to sleep,” said Buffy snuggling into her seat.

“Yes, of course. That makes much more sense,” Giles replied dryly as he set the station to a low relaxing volume. Within minutes, the car’s cabin was filled the sound of the girls’ quite snores and a report on the sudden cave-in of a small CA town.

***

Buffy found herself standing in the cavern of the hellmouth. It was hot and humid and felt so real. There was girls fighting for their lives all around her. The sound was deafening. Screams of pain, victory and the clanking of weapons is all she could hear.

Buffy closed her eyes to try and push back the sudden sensory overload she was experiencing and, when she felt calm enough, she opened them, looking around to catch a glimpse of Spike. Something told her she needed to find him. Save him.

As she turned to survey the battlefield, she was surprised when she saw herself at the far end of the cavern talking to The First. She knew that this meant that the amulet was near activation, so she quickly spun to face the mouth of the cavern, only to see Spike stumbling back toward the stairs. Buffy ran to Spike as a pillar of light shot skyward from his chest.

When she reached him, it was like the world around them suddenly froze. It was so quiet she could have heard a pin drop.

A slow seductive smirk crept onto Spike’s face. “I must say luv, you look bloody delicious. You get those pretty red threads for me?”

Confused, Buffy looked down to realized that he was referring to the red satin bathrobe she had found at the hotel. That was odd, had she been wearing it the whole time?

Ignoring his comment about how she was dressed, Buffy got straight to the point. “You don’t have to do this. Not to the end. Please leave here with me! I love you, Spike! Please!” Buffy pleaded.

Spike’s sultry smirk was quickly replaced with a sad, yet serious smile. “What is done, is done, pet. Can’t go changing it now.”

Suddenly, everything around them began to move again and the cavern started to crumble. The Turok- Han disintegrated as the soul-powered light filled the cavern.

“Your wrong we can change it! I have to. That’s why I’m here! Just take off the amulet. You’ve done enough! Please, Spike. I can’t watch you die again!” Buffy said with tears running down her face.

“You’re not here to save me, lamb. What’s done is done. You’re here for a message. I’m gone. You will not find me. Luv, I’m with the whistling wind and the angels.” Spike said and as flames started to ignite along his body.

“NO! I will not let it happen this time!” Buffy screamed, as she lunged for the amulet and yanked it from around his neck.

In a blink of an eye, Buffy found herself standing in a dark black room, looking through a window. On the other side, her last moments with Spike played out as they truly happened. The amulet still hanging from his neck. Buffy looked down at her hand to find she was only holding a hand full of dust. When she looked back up, her other self was gone and Spike was once again falling to cavern floor as ash.

***

“No!” Yelled Buffy, as she woke with a start. Causing both Giles and Willow, who were by the crater setting up, to jump from her sudden outburst.

Leaving Willow to finish setting up, Giles jogged to the car. “God lord, Buffy! Are you alright? You nearly gave us a heart attack,” he said after he pulled the car door open and squatted beside Buffy.

Buffy nodded her head yes as she tried to catch her breath and calm her rapid heartbeat, taking a moment to respond. Once she felt she was pulled together, Buffy turned to Giles and gave him a reassuring smile. 

“Sorry I scared you. I had a crazy vivid dream. It almost had a Slayer dream vibe to it. I don’t think we are going to find the amulet. If we do he isn’t going to be in it. I don’t know. In my dream, Spike said I wouldn’t find him. That he was with wind and angels… whatever that means. He also kept saying “what’s done is done.” Why would his body return if we couldn’t get all of him back?”

“Hmm, are you certain that it was Slayer dream?” asked Giles.

“Not one hundred percent, but it had all the characteristics of one. I mean, I could even smell the raunchiness that is the hellmouth.”

“Do you still want us to attempt the spell? Set up is almost complete.”

“Yes, let’s give it a try. If we can find the amulet then maybe we can find a way to fix him.”

“Ok, it shouldn’t be long then.”

“How long have we been here and why didn’t you wake me up?” asked Buffy.

“I just thought you could use the rest. The last couple of months have been very draining. I was going to wake you once we were ready to start. We will need your assistance for the spell.”

“Ok, I guess I’ll come out and stretch my legs before we get started.”

“I’ll call you over when we are ready,” said Giles, before heading back to Willow.

Stepping out of the car, Buffy stretched her back and headed to the edge of the crater and looked out over the darkness that saturated the sunken earth. Standing there alone, she quietly contemplated her dream. Was she just talking to the real Spike or was it the Powers that Be? Was he really gone or was that just a reflection of her own inner fears? What did he mean by wind and angels? That he’d made it to Heaven? There were so many more questions. What did any of it mean?

Sighing, Buffy turned her back to the crater and walked over to Willow, who had just finished laying out the last candle. “Scary dream? You ok?” Willow asked as she looked up at her friend.

“Yeah. I think we may come up with nothing here. It felt like a good old Slayer dream. Always so much fun… anyways, I think we should still give it a shot just in case the dream was nothing.”

“Ok, we’ll continue on then. Hey, so Giles was telling me about how you are experiencing physical discomfort when you’re away from Spike. What’s going on with that?”

Buffy scrunched her face in confusion. “You know, now you mention it, I’m realizing it’s gone away. It’s been gone since I woke up. Believe me, I’m not complaining, but it is weird.”

“Maybe it was trying to warn you of something and when you ignored it, it found another way to do it,” suggested Willow.

“Like with the dream?” Buffy asked.

“Right! So now there is no need for the weird tingles anymore,” said Willow.

“Maybe, Giles said he would look into it more. I’m choosing not to stress out about it until then. So how does this ritual work and what part do I play?” asked Buffy.

“Ah, I see we are about ready to start,” Giles said as he approached the girls.

“Yup, I was about to tell Buffy what we need to do, but we may as well get into place and then I’ll explain everything,” said Willow. “I’m going to light the candles really quick and you guys can sit within the circle.”

Once Willow finished her task and had rejoined them, Buffy cleared her throat and asked, “Am I going to be expected to talk in Latin?” She giggled nervously. “I have a hard enough time with English.”

Willow smiled sympathetically at Buffy. “Only once, I promise. We will link hands and I will ask the goddess Umbria to help us and once I’ve stated my request, we’ll all close our eyes and visualize the amulet while repeating the word reditum. It’s Latin for return. If the amulet is near it should appear in the bowl in front of us,” explained Willow.

“Ok, so I just have to think of the pretty shiny and say redrum? That-“

“Oh good heavens Buffy, the word is reditum. Please do take a moment to practice it. I don’t exactly fancy you sending us to some haunted hotel in the middle of the Colorado Rockies,” fussed Giles.

“Reditum, got it. Sorry, no haunted hotels, I promise,” Buffy reassured.

“Alright, everybody ready?” asked Willow. When everyone nodded their heads in the affirmative, Willow lite the bundle of sage and placed it back into the bowl resting in the middle of the circle. She then held out her hands.

Buffy took this as a hint to join hands with her friend and watcher. She then sat back and tried to relax as she watched Willow do her mojo.

Willow closed her eyes and began, “We call on Umbria, Goddess of all that is hidden. We beseech thee to return to us what was once ours. Umbria, please answer our pleas and help us find our hidden amulet.” Willow opened her eyes and nodded her head. She then closed them once more and began to chant, “Reditum, reditum, reditum…”

Taking the cue, both Buffy and Giles followed lead. They closed their eyes, brought up a mental image of the amulet and chanted.

Buffy could feel the magic flowing through the three of them, as though they were an electrical circuit. Wind and dust spun and whipped around as they chanted. Buffy did her beat to fully concentrate on the spell, but it felt like they had been chanting for 30 minutes and she could sense that Willow was beginning to weaken.

“Umbria, we beseech thee! Please answer our plea!” Willow shouted into the wind.

Suddenly, Buffy felt a great pressure upon them as though the wind had become a strong, suffocating vice. Willow’s hands were yanked from Giles and Buffy’s grip as she was forcefully shoved from the ritual circle. All at once the wind and dust settled and the bowl placed between them shattered.

Buffy was halfway to her friend when Willow sat up exhausted and shaky. “Willow! Are you ok? What just happened?”

“I’m fine….I’m ok, just worn out and my butt will probably be a little bruised, but I’m good. Umbria can sometimes be a little testy. She gets upset when she feels her time has been wasted. I was also being a little pushy near the end there. Long story short, she couldn’t find anything. I’m sorry Buffy. Maybe your dream was trying telling you something because the amulet isn’t here anymore.”

“Oh…” Buffy said quietly as Giles walked up behind her and laid a sympathetic hand on her shoulder.

“There are many other ways to locate the amulet, Buffy. Don’t give up hope now. You should go call Xander and see how Spike is doing. Fill everyone in on what we found out here. Perhaps they can start the research while we head back,” Giles suggested. He then reached down and helped Willow to a standing position and started to walk her toward the car.

Buffy rose up and watched as her friends slowly made their way to the vehicle, before turning her back to them and heading toward the crater’s edge. On her way, she couldn’t help herself and kicked the remains of the ritual bowl. Stupid bowl.

Once she reached the drop off of the crater, Buffy withdrew her phone from her pocket and dialed Xander’s number.

“Hey Buff! How are things going? You guys mojo that gaudy chunk of junk out of the hole yet?” Xander asked.

“No…its not here. We haven’t found it. How is Spike doing? Any change?”

“Wait, it’s not there? How is that possible? It was buried under an entire city.”

Buffy sighed tiredly. “I don’t really know Xander. Giles told me to ask you guys to start up the research while we are on our way back. Maybe try to find a way to locate the amulet. Now, how is Spike? Is he doing ok?”

“Sorry, Buffy. Yeah, he’s doing good. Mostly the same. Apart from some slight hair growth, he is exactly the same. I’ll round up the troops and get the research party started.”

“Ok, thanks Xan. Tell Dawn that we are not giving up and that I love her and will see her soon.”

“Will do. Get some rest and we will see you soon. Bye Buffy.”

“Bye Xander,” Buffy said as she shut her phone. 

She stared out into the inky blackness of the sinkhole she once called home. This place no longer held anything for her. It was no longer home. Her home now lay silent and still back in LA and he needed her. It was time to return. “Goodbye,” said Buffy and with her final farewell, she turned her back on the past and headed for the car and her future.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters fully belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Twentieth Century Fox. I only borrowed the characters for nonprofit entertainment! I do not own the premise of the show or sadly, any of the characters. This was written without any copywriter infringement intended.
> 
>  
> 
> I would like to give a huge thanks to my beta Sunalso.

Chapter 8

 

Sitting alone at his desk, in his new office, Angel contemplated the last 72 hours. It wasn’t his new job position or the recent decision he made regarding his friend’s memory that was causing his latest brood. It was Buffy.

How could she, in three days’ time, have decided to switch her allegiance that quickly? And from him to Spike no less. Take about trading down. He could not stand Spike, that little upstart. He has been nothing but a proverbial thorn in Angel’s paw since the moment he sauntered into his home. He should have staked Spike when Dru introduced him.

Angel picked up his mug and swallowed the remainder of his dinner before heavily slammed the cup down onto the desk. Standing up, he moved over to the necro-tempered glass that protected him from the rising sun and glared out at the waking city.

“What does she even see in him?” He asked himself aloud.

“Maybe it’s the bad boy imagine combined with the heart of a Victorian poet. Who can tell these days?”

The voice behind him cause Angel’s back to stiffen. It had been awhile since he had a visit from the demon and it never measured up to anything great when he did.

“I’m surprised I didn’t smell you the minute you walked in,” Angel said turning his head parallel with his shoulder. “I must be losing my touch.

“That’s one way of putting it,” Whistler said as he dropped a sealed package on Angel’s desk.

Hearing the resounding thump of the parcel on the wood, Angel turned around to finally face The Power’s messenger. “Presents? It’s not even Christmas,” Angel said facetiously.

“Don’t get too excited, Big Guy. It’s not a gift for a job well done. In fact, it’s kinda the opposite. More or less, it’s the boss’ last-ditch effort to reel you back in.”

“And what exactly is that supposed to mean? I’m still working for the good side. I’m trying to change things from the inside.”

“Really? Are you sure? All I know is, we have been running around crazy trying to avert the apocalypse the First decided to cook up. Then our favorite neighborhood Wicca throws us another curve ball by populating the world with Slayers. Then once everything has started to settle down, we find our “Champion” playing footsie with an evil corporation beneath his new fancy oak CEO desk. Got to say, it’s not building a whole lot of confidence for the Powers”

“Like I said, I was offered the job and I figured I would keep an eye on them from the inside. A takedown from within.”

“And was it necessary to distort the memories of your friends and colleagues? Take away their free will? Oh yeah, we caught that too. Do you honestly think that any of them would have actually chosen to work here if you hadn’t let your new employer tinker in their heads?”

“They did choose to work here by their own free will. What I did doesn’t have anything to do with their choice. I did it for my son. I had an opportunity to make his life better and that’s what I did. It not evil, it’s fatherhood.”

“Hmmm, ok. Well, whatever you need to tell yourself to help you look them in the eye. But no matter how you color it, the Powers are not very happy.”

Standing with his arms folded across his chest and a scowl on his brow, Angel silently stared at the Power’s representative. “So what? You’re here to sass me and send me to the corner for a timeout? I’m the only Champion the Powers have.”

“Are you completely sure about that?”

“Last time I checked, I was the only candidate. Who else would there be?” Angel didn’t know where Whistler was going with this, but he was starting to get a pretty bad feeling about it.

Whistler glanced at the package he dropped on the desk earlier and then snapped his sight back the increasingly agitated vampire in front of him. “I can think of someone. He isn’t exactly in commission right now, but he really wants it. Even if he doesn’t know it yet.”

Angel narrowed his eyes at the demon, “Out of commission?” He was getting a sour taste in his mouth as though his dinner was ready for an encore. “Out of commission how?”

“Come on now Angel, I know you’re not this dense. He fought for the soul he has and was doing good before he even had it. To be honest, we have had our eye on him for the last 5 years. He really shocked us with his part in stopping Acathla. We understand that it was a purely selfish act, but it was the beginning of his redemption, hands down. It was the pivotal moment in his life, it set him on that path. Once he fell in love with the Slayer, well, let just say we haven’t been able to look away. He has been giving us one surprise after another. Don’t get me wrong… he has still made some huge mistakes, but he was doing the best he knew how without a soul. When he fought for that soul, it was all they could talk about. When the First tormented him, the Powers were livid. They did everything in their power to rectify the situation.”

“How’s that?” Angel spat, followed with the deep roll of a growl.

A glint of anger flashed in Whistler’s eyes and he gave the vampire a look of warning. “You were the intended party for the amulet. Once again, Buffy throw us when she sent you away and chose Spike to wear it. She told him he was a Champion. She wasn’t entirely wrong. When he died in the battle we knew his story wasn’t done. That he would still be needed. We graced him with the same second chance we gave you after Acathla. But the amulet being what it is, it has somewhat effected the outcome.”

Angel stood silent for a moment and processed all Whistler has shared with him. He realized that if Buffy had not chosen Spike, Angel would be dead. “If I had gone to battle down in the hellmouth and died, would I have been returned as well?”

After a moment’s pause, Whistler cleared his throat and his face became pinched with annoyance, “Don’t you think we have given you enough second chances?”

“So what? Kill me off and on to the next Champion?”

Whistler’s scowl intensified and he tisked at Angle. “You know, Angel, for someone who’s been around for over 200 years, you are outstandingly immature,” he said in a tight voice. When Angel huffed and crossed his arms defensively across his chest, Whistler continued, “Look, this is why I’m here. This is your last chance to decide if you want to be the Champion of the Powers. Inside this package is the amulet. Champions have to make hard choices. Sacrifices.”

“I’ve made sacrifices. So you don’t need to tell me about it. What am I supposed to do with the amulet?”

“Inside of the amulet is Spike’s consciousness. It needs to be reunited with his body in order for him to be completely returned. You need to decide what is most important to you.”

Angel turns his back to Whistler and once again stares out the window. The now risen sun cause him to squint.

“I assume you know that no matter the choice you make the girl is lost to you. I can honestly say that I believe that she was always meant for him. You still have the Shanshu on the line though. If you chose to open the package, toss the amulet to the ground and Spike will be released. All you will need to do after that is place the amulet onto his body and then he will be good as new.”

Picking up the package, Whistler walked over to the window and stood next to Angel and held it out for him to take. After a moment’s pause, Angel took the yellow envelope, held it both hands, and looked down at it.

“You don’t have forever, so don’t take too long to make the decision,” Whistler said, before quietly slipping out of the room.

Even though Angel felt the moment he was alone, he quickly called out, “How long do I have?” Only to receive no answer.

Grumbling beneath his breath and with a scowl firmly set on his face, Angel made his way back to his desk. Settling into his seat, he reached over and hit a button to close out the morning sunshine and lifted the receiver to his phone. Angel was three numbers into Giles’ cell when there was a tentative knock on the door.

“Angel? Can I come in?” Fred asked from behind the office’s thick oak door.

“Um…just a second,” Angel called out as he quickly hung up the phone and shoved the envelope into his desk. “Come in.”

“Hey, what are you up too? We haven’t seen you in a while,” asked Fred sweetly as she slipped into the room.

“Oh, nothing. Just going over files and making phone calls. How are things going over at the hotel? Will everybody be ready to get back to work soon?” Angel asked as he flipped through a file that had been on his desk to feign the appearance of working.

As he sat there, Angel had to resist the urge to squirm. He could feel Fred silently watching him and wondered if she could see right through his farce.

After a moment pause Fred finally cleared her throat and hesitantly answered him, “Everything is going ok. We are not exactly finding everything we need, but we have stumbled on some good leads. Willow and Giles are on their way back from Sunnydale. They-”

“Why did they go back? Did Buffy go too?” Angel asked quickly looking up.

Angel’s sudden interruption caused Fred to jump and tilt her head and scowled at him. When she pressed her lips together and clearly refused to answer him, Angel know that if she wasn’t suspicious of him before, she definitely was now. He let his interest in Buffy’s where abouts show his hand.

Fred answered Angel without mentioning Buffy and he knew for sure that she was on to him and his intentions. “They are trying to locate the amulet…”

Angel flinched at this, causing Fred to pause a beat and raise her eyebrow. Hoping to hide the possible gilt on his face, Angel quickly looked down at the file in front of him. 

“We think we may need it to wake up Spike’s body,” continued Fred.

“Well hopefully you all will find what you need and everyone can get to work. Buffy can then take Spike and his annoying self and vacate my town.”

“I understand you’re hurt Angel, but if you really loved her you would want her to be happy. I’m sorry that her happiness is connected to another vampire, but if you ever want to be any part of her life, you should get rid of whatever bug you got bitin’ you in the butt.”

“The bug is Spike!”

“We’ll grow up and get over it!” Fred said annoyed. She then turned and headed to the exit only to turn and informed Angel, “Also I will be taking medical supplies for Spike, whether you like it or not.” She then stormed out of the room with a solid slam of the door.

Sighing, Angel closed the file in front of him and reached into his desk to retrieve Whistler’s package. Standing he headed to his elevator and went up to his penthouse. Upon entering his bedroom, Angel walked to his dresser and hide the package in the back of his sock drawer.

He was not ready to give up on Buffy yet. He was saving her this way. She was confused and was more than likely feeling indebted to Spike because he saved the world. He would give it a couple of days and then pull her aside and see if he could talk some sense into her. Maybe talk to Giles and see if he could get him to see his side. Giles surely didn’t want Buffy to have any kind of relationship with Spike.

Angel kicked off his shoes and hung his jacket on a chair before climbing into bed. It had been an exhausting morning.

****

As the rental pulled up in front of the hotel, Buffy was almost unable to contain herself from jumping out of the car and up the stairs to see Spike.

She also really needed to pee. They had made the trip back with no stops and Buffy’s bladder was ready to pop.

Once the vehicle came to a stop, Buffy launched out the door and was running up the stairs to her room. Buffy exploded through the door, dropping everything, startling Dawn.

“Buffy? Are you ok?”

“Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now!” Buffy said frantically in a sing-song tone, as she rushed into the bathroom. 

As Buffy emptied her bladder, she released a sigh of relief so loud she was certain Dawn could hear it from the other room.

“Better?” Dawn asked with amusement as her sister came out of the bathroom looking much more relaxed.

“Much better. How’s my sleeping beat-“ Buffy paused mid-question, as she noticed the hollows of Spike’s cheeks were more sunken than usual. “Is he looking thinner to you?” Buffy asked as she walked over to the bed and cupped Spike’s face with her hand. His face looked better but not by much. His healing was definitely starting to slow down. He was going to need blood very soon.

“Kinda hard to tell really, but he seems good. Was the best kid I’ve ever babysat.”

Buffy turned and gave her sister a lopsided smile, “You have never babysat any kids.”

“Exactly, that’s why he has been the best!” Dawn said with a big grin.

Buffy rolled eyes good naturally and turned back toward Spike.

“Oh, Fred said she wanted to talk to you after she got back from the lab. I think she may have figured out a way to feed him, so if he is losing weight he’ll gain it back,” said Dawn.

“ Oh thank goodness, that’s some great news…. Umm, so, did Xander fill you in?” Buffy asked.

“Yeah, but I’m not gonna give up. We will figure it out. We always do. Don’t worry Buffy.

Looking over her shoulder, Buffy smiled at her sister and said, “You’re right. I know. I just miss him is all. I had a dream on the way to Sunnydale. I was talking to him. Part of me thinks it was really him. So it was nice.”

“Really? What did he say?”

“Nothing much. He complemented what I was wearing,” Buffy said with a blush. “There was some weird saying about angels with wind… I don’t know. Mostly he just kept telling me we were not going to find him there and that I could not stop him from dying in my dream. Then I woke up.”

“Wait, he told you Angel has gas?” Dawn asked confused.

Buffy burst out in giggles before correcting her sister. “No, he said he was in with the whistling wind and angels. Nothing about Angel and flatulence… though maybe that’s why he always has such a sour look. He is holding it all in the last 200 years,” Buffy said laughing with her sister.

After calming down and collecting herself, Buffy sat on the edge of her bed and removed her shoes and let them drop to the floor.

“Thanks for looking after him, Dawnie. I think I’m gonna curl up and get some rest now though. Can we talk more later?” Buffy didn’t really feel the need for sleep. She just wanted to spend some time, lying in bed next to Spike. She felt as though there was a part of her that was missing when she was not near him and she had been gone for too long.

“Sure thing Buffy and you’re welcome.”

Buffy hugged Dawn and walked her to the door, closing and locking it behind her. Turning back to the bed, Buffy kicked off her jeans and climbed in, wiggling herself under Spike’s arm and molding her body along his.

As she let her body relax she pulled in a deep breath through her nose and sighed contently as she was rewarded with Spike’s unique scent. It was a smell she could never forget. She had always been oddly drawn to it. Even back when she had very first met him and he was trying to kill her. Most vampires she had come in contact with had a very raw and icky smell, but not Spike. Whenever they would fight, Buffy would catch his scent when she had to dodge a kick or punch. She could never pinpoint if he wore cologne or if his scent was just a wonderful mix of him and his environment. He smelled of aged leather and cigarette smoke, a mixed aroma she would never find unpleasant again. However, it wasn’t just these two things alone that signified her vampire, there was a masculine and earthy musk that was all him. Add all that to the smell of his soap and fragrant hair products and he was mouthwatering.

Not even three minutes after laying down there was a knock on the door, followed by Fred’s gentle voice.

“Buffy? I was wondering if we could talk. I’ve looked into feeding options. I would like to discuss them with you if it’s a good time.”

Buffy release a small whine from the back of her throat and pouted. Giving Spike’s shoulder a quick peck, Buffy rolled off the bed, collected her jeans, and slipped them on before heading to the door.

“Buffy?”

“Coming,” Buffy called out before pulling the door open. She smiled at Fred and moved to let her into the room.

“Hey y’all, I hope I didn’t wake anyone up.” Fred glanced at Spike. “Though I guess if I woke him up that would have been a good thing,” she said with a shy, awkward smile.

Buffy found Fred’s smile to be strangely contagious and her mild annoyance of having to get out of bed was quickly fleeting. She couldn’t imagine anyone ever getting or staying upset with this sweet woman. She almost reminded Buffy of Tara in a way, but with a southern charm and a bit more confidence.

“That would have been wonderful,” Buffy agreed. “You would have made me the happiest woman she in the world.”

“Well, I may have not been able to solve the sleeping problem, but I may have come up with something for getting him feed. It’s nothin’ real high tech or anything, but it should get the job done.”

“Yay! I’m so glad to hear you have found a way to get food in him. How are we going to do it?” Buffy asked anxiously.

“Well, while I was digging through the lab for solutions it dawned on me that all we really need to do is get the blood into his stomach. We don’t need nothing fancy for that, just some good old medical techniques. I reckon we try a feeding tube. Run it from his nose to his stomach. You would have to feed him, but somethin’ is tellin’ me you won’t mind a bit.”

“You know how to do that? I thought you were just a scientist”

“Well, no, I can’t do it, but the law firm has a medical group and I can have one of the nurses come by get him set up.”

Buffy scrunched up her brows and bit her lip. She wasn’t sure she felt alright with the law firm’s assistants with Spike. Wasn’t sure if it was safe for him.

“I can tell you’re a little nervous about involving Wolfram and Hart,” said Fred after noticing Buffy’s hesitation to agree. “But the situation being what it is I don’t see how we could recruit a normal nurse. They would want to know why we want to put a feeding tube on a corpse not to mention what we plan to feed him with it.”

“I know your right, but I still don’t like it. Is there a way to find an outside nurse who works with demons?”

“I can look into it. I’ll ask Wesley or Loren if they have heard of anyone. I can get the supplies until I hear back from one of them.”

Buffy smiled in relief. “Thank you for all you are doing for us. It really means a lot to me. I hope that it isn’t causing too much tension between you and Angel.”

“Not at all. He can be mighty prickly sometimes, but he usually gets over it. I think he also has a lot on his mind right now. I really want us to try to give him the benefit of the doubt. Though I do have to say I’ve never seen him this bad. He must really dislike Spike.”

“They have never gotten along from what I understand. I think it started with Spike’s sire, Drusilla, she was kinda a ho-bag,” Buffy said, giving a point look so Fred would understand. “So I get why my choosing Spike is a possible sore spot for Angel. I have a feeling that he was usually the one who came out on top in that situation. The crazy bitch loved her Daddy.”

“Oh, that’s kinda icky,” Fred said, her eyes widening.

“Tell me about. Angel wasn’t her real daddy, he was just her sire. Still doesn’t make it any less gross. Y’know?” Buffy explained shrugging her shoulders. A small smile then flitted across her lips and she continued, “Anyway, I’m older now and I come to realize that what I share with Spike is far more profound than anything I had with Angel. When you boil it all down, Angel was young girl puppy love.”

“We all have those first loves that we think will last forever, but rarely do. I’m sure glad that Spike and found each other though. I’m happy for y’all, even if Angel can’t find it in his grumpy old self to be,” Fred said, kindly, before shifting toward the door. “I know you’re probably pretty tired with everything going on the last several days so I’m gonna scoot and start looking for a nurse doctor. You get some rest.”

“Ok, thank you again, Fred. I’ll see you later tonight,” Buffy said as she followed her new friend to the door.

“Hey, Buffy… I know Angel’s my friend… he rescued me from this horrible dimension I got myself stuck in… and I always looked up to him and all the good he does, but...” Fred paused thinking how to explain how she felt. “But I don’t think you should trust him. Especially around Spike. I just have a feeling that he knows something he isn’t sharing with the class. I really want to hope that he would not be so selfish to try to keep y’all away from each other, but I’m honestly not so sure at the moment. Just be careful.”

Buffy could tell that Fred was having a hard time accepting her newfound doubt in her savior and friend. Buffy laid her hand on Fred’s shoulder and gave her a sympathetic smile, “Thank you for the heads up. I know it’s hard when you’re having a hard time recognizing someone you care about, but you just have to remind them of what made you care for them in the first place. I kind of went through it with Willow last year, but in the end, she was able to pull herself back together. All she needed was a story about a yellow crayon. Maybe you need to find Angel and your yellow crayon.”

Smiling at Buffy, Fred thanked her and slipped out the room. As Buffy was about to latch the door behind Fred, she paused and reopened it and placed the do not disturb sign on the handle. She then shut and locked the door and once again shimmied out of her jeans. As she crawled herself back into bed next to Spike, she took another large inhale through her nose and smiled as she nestled her head on his shoulder.

“I love you,” said Buffy sleepily as she quickly drifted off.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters fully belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Twentieth Century Fox. I only borrowed the characters for nonprofit entertainment! I do not own the premise of the show or sadly, any of the characters. This was written without any copywriter infringement intended.
> 
>  
> 
> I would like to give a huge thanks to my beta Sunalso.

Chapter 9

 

The last thing Spike could remember was searing heat and the painful crumble of his deteriorating body. When he came to, he found himself surrounded by smooth, angular walls and unending darkness. From outside of his prison, only a muffled rumble and clattering could be heard. Every once and a while he was jostled, or his enclosure would be pelted with what Spike could only imagine was debris. It took him a while to realize it because it wasn’t where he was expecting to end up, that he had somehow become trapped inside the bloody amulet. 

It was the oddest sensation. He clearly had no physical form but was still able to feel the texture of the barrier that encased him and hear the sounds of Sunnydale falling around him. Spike was pretty sure that if he wasn’t buried at the bottom of a crater, and had a little outward lighting, that he would also be able to see some of his surroundings.

Apprehension about being stuck at the bottom of a hole for the rest of eternity was starting to worm its way into Spike’s mind. In his opinion, this fate would be far worse than Hell, and he was certain he would go insane… again.

I saved the sodding world! The least the bloody Powers could do was send me to a proper Hell dimension.

The next thing Spike began to worry about was Buffy. Did she make it or was she buried beneath the destruction of their home as well?

No, she had to have made it. I would know if she hadn’t. I would have felt it in my gut…well no, because I don’t have one anymore, but I would just know.

God he missed Buffy.

Spike still didn’t know what to make of her declaration of love right before the collapse or what had happened with their hands. He wanted to believe her. He felt something passing through their ignited palms that could have been love, and it wasn’t bloody often she tossed around those kinds of words, but part of him was unwilling to accept them. Sure, they had been getting on better than they ever had, but as he had said before, it was just a little comfort from the cellar dweller. Plus, she had made out with Angel just yesterday, and he had heard their conversation about cookie dough. 

It was pretty clear that my “being in her heart” wasn’t going to make me the lucky cookie eating bloke. Which is a shame, seeing as I love both Buffy and cookies. Hmmm, Cookie Buffy would be absolutely scrumptious.

Spike sighed

Why would Buffy have said it then? The only reason Spike could come up with was that she was trying to get him to leave with her. Through their link, he had sensed Buffy’s worry and fear. But what would’ve been her game plan if he had yanked off the amulet and ran with her? What would she say once they were out of harm’s way? Would she have taken the words back? Spike couldn’t let himself think that Buffy, what with the progress they had made, would be that cruel. Surely, she knew it would have killed him.

Guess I’ll never know.

While he was contemplating his last moments with Buffy, Spike had become unaware of the settling environment outside the amulet. It wasn’t until air within his cage began to warm that he notice how quiet it had become. The silence was short-lived, however, when a high pitch whine started to ring and the amulet started to vibrate.

What the bloody hell is going on?

It was then the amulet started to jerk upward causing concrete and rebar to scratch and screech across the jewel’s surface. The heat within the stone had increased so much that Spike was certain that if he had a body, it would combust all over again. Spike got the feeling that the necklace was actively fighting its retrieval, as its forced incline completely stopped only to be replaced with the sensation of something trying to yank Spike, himself, from the amulet. The humming grew louder, the stone’s vibrations harder, and the tugging pressure increased to the point where Spike felt as though he would burst. Then as suddenly as it all started, it stopped a huge flash of light and a pop of released pressure. Absolutely nothing happened. He and the amulet where still snuggly barricaded beneath the earth.

Well, wasn’t that a bit anticlimactic?

He did however still feel a slight tug toward the unknown. Almost as if he wasn’t trapped, he would be drawn to something. Other than this odd sensation, everything was back to how it was before.

As the hours passed, the silence and darkness became almost unbearable. Spike would try to distract himself by thinking about this life, Buffy, and all things he could be doing at that moment. But these distractions would sometimes lead Spike stumbling into a pity party. He missed his telly, smokes, and bourbon. Most of all he missed the beautiful smile and sweet smell of his Slayer.

What I wouldn’t give to wrap up with my girl. What I wouldn’t kill for a bottle ‘bout now. I’d drink myself right into oblivion, I would. Wouldn’t be giving a rat’s ass ‘bout where I was and who I wasn’t holding. He gave a mental pout.

Eventually, time no longer held any meaning to Spike, as he had no clue how long he’d been hidden beneath the remains of Sunnydale, but it already felt like an eternity. Never ending silence and darkness was all he had now. That was until everything started to glow and shake. Maybe someone was digging up the crater looking for survivors. Then the humming started.

Balls, not this again! Spike thought. But to be honest, he didn’t really mind the intrusion. It gave him something to focus on other than the continuous blackness and quiet solitude.

As the rumbling became a quake and the humming was now the squeal that resembled a teapot, Spike realized that this time felt different. There was no intense pressure barring down on him. Nor was there any pull to the actual amulet itself. He did however feel an odd tingling sensation. Spike could actually smell the magic at work. Someone or something was trying to retrieve the amulet. Maybe the Scoobies had figured out he was down here, and Red was mojoing him out of this hole. Not that he thought that they’d go out of their way to recuse him, but maybe Buffy had insisted.

The next thing Spike knew he was swinging back and forth as though he was sitting on a swing. The bright light had disappeared and was replaced by darkness, but one that differed from what he had become accustomed. It was now diluted by moonlight. He was out of the crater!

Hope exploded inside him. He may still be in the amulet, but at least now there was real hope of being released. He had to wonder though, who had recused him from his grave of rubble? Spike squinted as he peered through blurry opaqueness of the gem, try to get a glimpse of he savior. As he strained to make out an outline, a muffled male voice from just outside the amulet caused his to scowl.

Is this wanker talking to me? If so, I bloody well can’t hear him. He is going have to speak up! Spike and the amulet were then placed in what he could only assume to be the speaker’s pocket.

Well isn’t this just peachy, more pitch-black darkness, was Spike’s last thought before becoming weighted down with an intense exhaustion. It came on so suddenly that he couldn’t resist its pull and quickly fell asleep.

In the time that he had been trapped within the amulet, Spike had found that shifting into slumber was more like temporary shutting off then actually sleeping. That was until today. He felt although he had been drugged and forced into sleep only to wake later and find himself in a white room. By this point, he had become so used to a dark environment that the brightness of the room nearly blinded and he had to shield his eyes. Once he was able to open them fully, he became aware that he had a physical form and was dressed in his usual attire. As Spike walked through the room, the heavy clomping of his boots echoed throughout the chamber. Was this Heaven? Was he getting a reward for saving the world?

“Of a sort,” said a voice directly behind Spike.

Spike quickly spun around and dropped into a defensive stance.

“Who are you,” Spike growled at the man… no demon, he definitely smelled like a demon. He also clearly didn’t know how to dress.

“Clam down, William. I’m with the good guys. I guess you could say I’m a messenger of the PTB. We’ve been watching you for a while now, and I got to say, you know how to grab someone’s att—“

“I asked you who you were! You best be giving names or I’m ‘bout to be a really awful guest,” Spike said with a growl and flash of fang.

The demon huffed and tugged the front of his shirt with indignation.

“The names Whistler. As I was saying, the PTB are interested in you. They like the changes you have made in yourself. The fact that you sought out your soul and fought for it as a soulless vampire is amazing. It has never happened before in the history of the world. You are truly unique,” Whistler explained.

“Oh well, when do I get my new shiny trophy? I mean it’s great and all, but it doesn’t bloody well explain why I’m here or what you want with me.”

“You’re here because the Powers think you deserve a second chance. Your story wasn’t over yet. The amulet wasn’t meant for you, and they had bigger plans heading your way. They want to make things right.”

Spike tilted his head and squinted at Whistler as he considered this explanation. Dropping his defensive stance, Spike decided that he wanted to see how things were going to play out.

If the amulet wasn’t meant for me then who was the poor bloke who was? Angel maybe, but why would the Powers throw their proclaimed Champion into a crystal cell?

“You the one who pulled me out the pit and does my being in this white room mean I’ve been sprung from that gaudy piece of rubbish?” asked Spike.

“That would be me. Though I got to say I wasn’t sure it was going to work considering how our first attempt ended. You probably can figure out when that was.”

“Yeah, it was the first pop and light show.”

The Whistler nodded his head in the affirmative.

“We did not anticipate the intensity of the amulet’s binding and sealing properties. We were hoping that your essence would return to your body, but the amulet’s hold was too strong. It wasn’t a complete loss though. We were able to reconstruct your body.”

“My body? Since I’m guessing that I’m still snuggly stored away in that stone means I’m clearly not wearing my body at the moment. Where, may I ask, is it?”

“It’s in the possession of the original Slayer.”

“You mean Buffy, right? She made it out ok? She’s alright?” asked Spike.

“Physically, she is fine. Though she will be a lot happier once we’ve gotten you back to your body. And can I just say, that girl can run. We were worried she wasn’t going to make it to your body in time. Things may have gotten a little flammable, but she has it under control, and your body should be good as new when we get you back in it.”

“You dropped my body in broad daylight! Bloody brilliant. What did you lot think would happen? That I’d get glorious golden tan lines?” Shouted Spike, beginning to pace.

“I’ll admit, it could have been better planned, but everything worked out fine, and the Slayer is taking great care of you.”

Slowly coming to a stop, Spike drew his coat around him and tilted his head. “If you lot can bring me here, why can’t you just pop me back into my body?”

“Because you’re still technically inside the amulet. You could say we have just tapped into your mind while you were sleeping.”

“So you’re telling me that you and the Powers roofied me and then wiggled and wormed your way into my mind? How do I know anything you’re telling me is real and you’re not just a figment of my imagination?”

“I don’t know what to tell you, William. You’re just going to have to find a way to trust me. Believe me when I say I’m about to give you an opportunity you don’t want to turn down.”

Spike stood and stared at the demon. “Ok, say I give you the benefit of the doubt. What’s in it for me?”

“How about a chance to touch and talk to Buffy?”

Spike straightened his back and raised his eyebrow.

“Ok, not going to lie. You got me hooked. But, now you’re going to tell what the sodding catch is.”

Whistler shook his head with a smile and chuckled.

“You’re always a sharp one. The Powers want to know how good you are at following their orders, seeing as though there may be an opening in the Champion department. They think it belongs to you, but they want to stick a proverbial toe in the water.”

“Champion? That’s the Great Poof’s gig? What has he done to piss off the big boys and get the boot and what makes the Powers think I’d even want the job?

“Angel has been making some questionable choices of late and has left the Powers feeling as though they may have been too quick in declaring their Champion. In light of your gradual developments and recovery of soul, they believe it was always meant to be your ‘gig.’ As for whether you want it or not, consider this, the benefits are pretty great, and you’d be getting one up on Angel. We’ve been watching long enough to know how appealing a prospect that’d be for you.”

“Ok, but again what’s the catch. What are they expecting me to do?”

“All you have to do is deliver a message to the Slayer.”

***

 

As soon as Spike agreed to deliver the message to Buffy, he was once again overcome by an overwhelming exhaustion, causing him to crumple to the floor of the white room. When he came to, he was standing in the middle of the Hellmouth with all the bitty Slayers fighting around him.

“What the bloody hell is this?”

It all felt so real. Like time had been rewound and he was once again going to live out the battle. Spike only had a moment to process everything going on around him before the tell tale burning tingle began in the center of his chest. Right beneath the amulet.

Instinctively, Spike reached up to yank off the dreadful thing. How was he to get a message to the Slayer if he was a pile of conscious dust trapped inside a hideous babble? As his fingers brushed the necklace, a voice from within his mind, one that was not his own, caused him to pause.

No, stop! Leave it where it is. It must end the way it had originally.

“You’ve got to be kidding me! Whistler? I swear, your Powers are just as bad as Red. Always butting into people’s thought waves without asking first.”

Sorry pal. It’s just how these things are done. We are actually within one of Buffy’s Slayer dreams. I’ve found it’s the best way to approach her. That way everyone’s ribs stay where they are rightfully attached.

“Um, ok…” Spike said with some confusion as to what he meant.

It’s a long story. Anyway, we have to try to keep it as close to the original script as possible. I mean there’s going to be some variation, being that you are going to be giving her a message, but you can not take off the amulet and she can not save you. No matter how much she tries, she can not. It must end the way it did in real time. Are we clear?

“Crystal.”

 

Good, showtime.

Just than, a searing beam of light burst through Spike’s chest, causing him to stumble back onto the wall of the cavern. It was then he heard her call his name. The moment his eyes landed on her, all the pain he was feeling faded into the background. If he had needed to breathe, he would be incapable. His Slayer was bloody gorgeous.

As she ran to him, the only thing he saw was her face. It was painted with hope, determination, and fear. But most of all, he saw her love. Buffy’s never ending love for him and it caused Spike’s heart to clench. Knowing his girl, she had every plan to save him and he was going to have to break her heart.

She can not save you.

Just before she reached him, Spike hissed through clenched teeth, “Got the sodding memo, you wanker!”

As Buffy stopped in front of Spike, it was like the room filled with cotton. Everything slowed to a near halt, and all noise ceased to be heard. The only thing left was Buffy. He took a moment to take her in from head to toe, causing his usual lascivious smirk to slide onto face. He would never get over how sexy his bird was. She was wearing a silky, vintage robe in his favorite color no less. Due to this sight or her, he was experiencing the customary tightening of his jeans, that often occurred when she was around.

Now is not the time William. We don’t have forever. You must repeat everything I tel you.. As close to how I say it as you can. Remember, this is a test to see if you can do as is expected of you.

No worries. Will do.

“I must say luv, you look bloody delicious. You get those pretty red threads for me?” Spike asked, with mischief twinkling in his eyes.

Buffy’s big, green eyes widened and her cheeks flushed momentarily, then her brow creased in confusion. Suddenly, as though something had dawned on her, Buffy quickly glanced down at herself and quietly hummed.

Being typical Buffy, she chose to ignore his less than discreet seduction and got straight to her point, “You don’t have to do this. Not to the end. Please leave here with me! I love you, Spike! Please!”

As she pleaded him, tears started trail down her face. Causing Spike’s smirk to melt with his heart. Here stood the woman he loved, begging him to stay with her. To not leave her and there was nothing he could do to change it. How could he ever have doubted what she said the first time they were here. It was all so clear to him now. Tears welled in his eyes and he swallowed back a sob.

Tell her what’s done is done. That can not be changed.

Smiling sadly, Spike repeat what he was told, “What is done, is done, pet. Can’t go changing it now.”

Suddenly, the cavern was once again filled with the noise of the ongoing battles and as the brilliant light poured from Spike’s chest it started to crumble the Turok-Han all around them. It was as though someone somewhere had hit a play button.

Seeing the fear in his Slayer’s eyes was worse than death to him. Spike could hear the panic raising within Buffy as she continued with her pleas.

“You’re wrong we can change it! I have to. That’s why I’m here! Just take off the amulet. You’ve done enough! Please, Spike. I can’t watch you die again!”

You must tell her that her purpose here is not to save you. She can not chase the past. That she is here to receive a message. You are gone and she will not find you here. Now this is the most important part. You must say it exactly. Tell her you are with the whistling wind and the angels.

Are you bloody serious? That is so poncy and I know a thing or two about being a ponce. Spike thought back.

William…

Spike sighed and cupped Buffy’s face with his hands, “You’re not here to save me, lamb. What’s done, is done. You’re here for a message. I’m gone. You will not find me. Luv, I’m with the whistling wind and the angels.” He then, removed his hand from her cheek as his body started ignite.

He could see in her eyes that she was going to do something stupid and willful. It was in her nature. It was one of the things he loved most about her. No one told her what to do. Before he could stop her, she lunged forward and yanked the amulet from his neck. He didn’t get a chance to hear what she had yelled as she ripped it from his body, as he suddenly found himself back in the white room, standing in front of a window watching himself crumble to the ground.

“I swear, there have never been a more unpredictable Slayer. You did great by the way. The Powers are very pleased. Also, don’t worry, we were able to yank you back before she decided to be bull headed and not heed the warnings.”

“Not now Whistler. Sod off and give a bloke a minute,” replied Spike with shaky voice.

Spike’s whole body was trembling. His heart ached and his tears wouldn’t stop. He looked down at his hand. He could still feel the warmth from her beautiful face and the moisture from her tears. He had to do everything he could to get back to her. Even if it meant jumping through the Powers hoops.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its characters fully belong to Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Twentieth Century Fox. I only borrowed the characters for nonprofit entertainment! I do not own the premise of the show or sadly, any of the characters. This was written without any copywriter infringement intended.
> 
>  
> 
> I would like to give a huge thanks to my beta achebe.

Chapter 10

It was late morning when Angel was awoken from fitful sleep. He had been plagued with horrible nightmares of Buffy and Spike, specifically them living happily together. He dreamt of Spike shanshuing and marrying Buffy, midday in a sunny field of wildflowers. The dream that woke Angel in a cold sweat, however was the one where Buffy was riding Spike into oblivion in an attempt to start a family. Just thinking about it caused a cold shiver to run down Angel’s back.

Crawling out of his bed, Angel headed to the bathroom to clean up. While showering he decided it was time he head over to the Hyperion and see how far Buffy had gotten in her research on how to wake Spike. He also wanted to talk to Giles. Surely he didn’t want his Slayer slumming it up with the likes of Spike and if he was being supportive, then maybe he could talk some sense into him.

Angel also had a feeling he needed to try and mend some bridges with both his group and Buffy. He needed his friends at work. They were part of his team and he couldn’t take down an evil law firm by himself. As for Buffy, if he mended the rift between them there was a better chance of him getting her to see reason.

With his mind made up, Angel quickly stepped from the shower and got himself ready for the day. He decided that bringing some of the firm’s expensive otter blood would help make him appear on board with Spike’s rescue.

As Angel headed to the elevator he paused. He was overcome by a sudden moment of doubt. Was he doing the right thing? The Powers must be mistaken to think Spike would make a better Champion and better partner for Buffy. There was no way that was true. If he played into what the Powers wanted, in the end he would be just as responsible for the enviable downfall of the balance of good and evil. Spike just didn’t have what it took to be a Champion. The only things that boy had ever been good at was killing slayers and writing an occasional decent sonnet. That last one was only a matter of personal opinion. Nonetheless, Angel felt the familiar tug of guilt. He might not like Spike, but he is family and the thought of leaving him trapped within the amulet weighed heavily on Angel.

Shaking off his internal battle, Angel stepped into the elevator. He didn’t have time to second guess his plan, but as the elevator doors started to close, Angel shot out his hand and pry them open. He quickly stopped from the lift and rushed to his bedroom and stopping in front of his dresser. Angel slowly opened the drawer and stared at the yellow package hidden in the back. After a long moment, he slipped the package from the dresser and begun to tear the corner to open it, only to pause and huff.

“No… I’m sorry Spike. I just can’t let you have her,” Angel said out loud to the room. He then turned and headed to his closet where he opened the hidden wall safe and placed the package inside. Angel returned to the elevator, this time allowing the doors to completely close.

***

Across town, Buffy stretched lazily as she woke, feeling completely refreshed. Glancing over at the clock she discovered that it was almost three pm and she had gotten nearly ten hours of uninterrupted sleep. Smiling contently, Buffy rolled back over and curled herself around her silent bedmate.

“Morning handsome. Well, afternoon I guess.”

Her morning peace was short lived, as she quickly became aware of the sharp edges and hollows of Spike’s body. Looking up at his face, Buffy was relieved to notice that almost all damages he received from the sun had disappeared. As well as, his eyebrows and lashes had returned as well, and his head was now covered in short, yet dangerously adorable light brown curls. Spike’s pallor, however had worsened and the angles of his face were now more drastic, causing him to appear sunken.

Sighing, Buffy leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on Spike’s left temple and rolled out of bed. She had to talk to Fred. Her man needed blood now. Heading into the bathroom Buffy quickly showered and dressed. Before heading out, Buffy tucked the blanket tightly around Spike.

Sitting next to him, she leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss upon his lips and pressed her forehead against his. “I promise I won’t be gone long. Just going to grab a bite and find Fred. Should only take about 30 minutes. So don’t go running off mister,”Buffy said as she stood up and sweetly patted his chest.

Buffy saw Fred as soon as she reached the bottom landing of the lobby. She offered the other girl a sweet smile and greeted her.

“How did you sleep. I was starting to think you were never going to wake up,” Fred said with a giggle.

“I know. I slept like the dead. I must of really needed it. The last couple of weeks have been high on the crazy meter. Sleep was not exactly included.”

“I can image. I bet fighting the first evil is no picnic. Oh hey, before I forget, Giles wanted me to let you know that he and Xander headed over to the hospital to pick up some of the girls that where ready to be discharged.”

“Now that you mention it, there is a definite lack of noise around here. I got to say, it’s pretty refreshing. They must of brought some of the other girls with them.”

“I’m not sure, but it sure is nice having a moment of quiet,” Fred agreed.

“Well, I’m glad I found you. I actually came down to grab something to eat and to see if you had any leads on a nurse.” Buffy said, her stomach growling almost on cue. Buffy nervously smiled at Fred.

“Well, that will not do. Come on,” said Fred as she lead Buffy into the kitchen. “I think we have some cereal or bread for toast. Maybe even some eggs if you’re lucky.”

Not for the first time, Buffy was blown away by Fred’s kindness. Upon entering the kitchen, the other woman ushered Buffy to a seat and started to dig through the cupboards and fridge. It wasn’t long before Buffy became lost in thought as she watched Fred scurry about the room preparing them both a meal.

“Buffy?” Fred asked, as she pause to look expectedly at Buffy.

“I’m sorry, I was being a space cadet. What was the question?” Buffy asked with an apologetic smile.

“That’s alright, I was just askin’ how you like your eggs.”

“Oh, scrambly goodness please!” Buffy said with a bright smile.

“Okey dokey,” replied Fred cheerily as she started to cook. “I was actually waiting for you to wake so I could let you know that I talked to my friend Lorne, he used to own a human friendly karaoke lounge not far from here. Anyway, he was able to give me a name of a nurse who would being willing to help. I guess she use to date one of the bartenders, who was half-demon. I hope you don’t mind, but I gave her a call and she is going head over after her shift.”

“That is great news! I mean it, such a relief. I’m glad you called. The sooner he gets blood the better. He is really starting to lose weight. He seems mostly healed, but I think the process took up all his reserves. I really must thank you again, Fred. You have been so helpful and sweet.”

“You’re welcome, it really is nothing. Just doing the right thing. I like helping people,” Fred said smiling as she placed a plate in front of Buffy and sat down across from her.

While the girls ate their meals and chatted, neither where aware of Angel arriving at the Hyperion or when he silently slipped up the stairs and headed to the Honeymoon suite.

***

Before riding over to the hotel, Angel decided that he wanted to talk to Buffy first, so he could feel out the severity of the situation. As he was leaving the office, Angel grabbed some otter’s blood in hope of offering it as an olive branch of “friendship and support.” Yeah, not likely.

As he entered the the Hyperion, Angel was surprised to find the lobby empty. Concerned that he had missed Buffy, he closed his eyes in concentration as he listened for heartbeats within the hotel. He was able to pick up at least seven different rhythms. Two in the kitchen to his right and the remaining five upstairs. Quickly deciding that Buffy would most likely be upstairs with Spike, Angel took the stairs two at a time headed in the direction of Buffy’s room.

Angel raised his fist to knock on her door, only to pause as he realized that her room was completely silent. Lowering his hand, he looked around the hall to make sure no one could see him and then placed his ear to the door. Nothing… there was no heartbeat within the suite.

Hmm, maybe she went to her sister’s room. 

Straightening up, Angel walked over Dawn’s room and once again placed his ear to the door. He was met with the quiet snore and slow steady cardiac rhythm of a sleeping human. She was alone.

Confused as to where Buffy might have gone, Angel stood in the middle the hotel hallway. He was surprised that Buffy would just leave Spike alone, with no one to protect him. She made it clear she didn’t trust him. Hence, the otter’s blood. Remembering the dual heartbeats coming from the kitchen, Angel turned back to the stairs and drew in a large inhale through his nose. Gotcha!

Buffy had recently descended the stairs. Taking in another deep breath he also picked up on Fred’s scent from below. They must be the two beats he heard coming from the kitchen. Angel was about to start down the stairs when something occurred to him. He slowly turned his head and gave a side long gaze at Buffy’s door.

Four days. Four days and badly injured with little to no blood. The wasting process has undoubtedly started. Much longer and poof. Nothing but dust. Could this be any easier to clean up? Slip in do what needs to be done and slip out. None the wiser. 

A smile slowly crept its way onto Angel’s face as he turned and quickly walked back to Buffy’s door. Looking around once more to make sure he was still alone, Angel jerked the door’s handle and broke the lock with ease. He than quietly slipped into the room, shutting the door behind him.

As he stood in the middle of the room, the first thing Angel noticed was Spike’s scent. It was off somehow, making him wonder if had anything to do with his consciousness being trapped in the amulet.

The second thing Angel noticed was that Spike was wasting away to nothing, as he had suspected. However, now that he saw him, Angel was surprised to how thin Spike had become. He now felt certain this was the best plan. Any longer without blood the damage to his body would be irreversible. Angel knew without a doubt, he would not feel any guilt about staking Spike, as it would be an act of mercy.

Part of Angel was actually shocked that Buffy would let Spike get this bad and still claim to love him. Clearly, that was not the truth and she only felt indebted to Spike, as he had suspected. Otherwise, she would be much more concerned for his wellbeing. This could be a good sign for her and his future.

Angel had been so distracted by Spike’s condition, that he did not hear Buffy and Fred as they made their way to the room. As he slipped his hand into his pocket to retrieve his stake the door behind him opened. He only had enough time to hear Fred say his name before he found himself airborne and hitting the wall on the other side of the room.

By time Angel had pulled himself up from the floor, Buffy had managed to place herself between Spike and himself. He also noted that this also included the door and himself.

“Well, hello to you too, Buffy. I think I prefer your usual way of greeting me.”

“I’m only going to ask you once. What are you doing in my room and what were you about to do to Spike?” asked Buffy, completely in Slayer mode and her voice raising with each word.

“You know, you could have asked me before you kicked me across the room.”

“Ok…,” Buffy said, before rushing toward Angel and kicking his right knee out from under him and causing him to drop down to his left in front of her. Pulling back her fist, Buffy punched Angel sending him sprawling backwards into the wall behind him. She the grabbed him by the lapels of his coat and pulled him back to his feet and shoved him back against the wall. Buffy pulled a stake from her back pocket and pinned Angel to the wall by his throat.

“I hope you’re prepared to cough up those toothpicks now. I know you thought that was an empty threat, but I think I’m ready to show you how empty it was not.”

Angel raised his hands in surrender. He really need to get control of this situation before Buffy did something that she would later regret. If she killed him now she would be heart broken once she was over this Spike obsession and realized what she had done.

“Look I’m sorry! I came by to talk to you. To apologize for when you got here. I was an ass. When I got to the door I knocked, but there was no answer. As I started to walk away I thought I heard something and I panicked.” Angel could tell she was starting to buy it as her hand with the stake lowered a fraction of an inch. He decided it would be best if he really laid it on and use shame from one of his own past failures to explain his presence. Ducking his head and averting his eyes he continued, “All I could think about was when I was sick and nearly starved. How I lost control and almost killed you. I knew it had been awhile since he’s fed and I’ve been out of the loop so I didn’t know if he had woken yet.”

Buffy reluctantly lowered her stake and gave Angel a hard shove before stepping back.

“First of all, Spike would never hurt me like that. He has a pretty impressive control over his demon. Secondly, his demon loves me just as much as the man. While yours only loves to see me in pain. Lastly, let’s say that was why you where in here, fine, but you still have failed to tell what you were about to do to him before we walked in. You were reaching into your pocket. So Angel, do tell. What’s in there?”

Angel swallowed hard and wiped at blood that was dripping from his nose. Buffy has never looked or spoken to him with this much contempt. Not even when he had lost his soul. When had he completely changed positions with Spike?

“When I got in here and realized that you weren’t in any trouble, I noticed how bad he looked. I brought some high quality otter’s blood as a peace offering. I was going to try to get him to drink some. He is in really bad shape Buffy. Any longer without food he could just dust or if he doesn’t, the damage to his brain will be too great. Even if you are able to get him back in there it will do no good.”

He watched as Buffy’s brows drew together with concern. She turned towards Spike and slowly lowered herself to sit next to him on the bed. Pulling his now bony hand into her lap, she began to cry. All the fight had deflated from her and all that was left was sorrow.

Ok, now I really do feel like an ass. I really hate seeing her cry. Even if it is over Spike.

Slowly approaching Buffy, Angel laid a hand on her shoulder briefly, causing it to stiffen. Taking the hint he removed his hand and reached into his pocket and pulling out the thermos of blood. He gently placed it on the nightstand and head for the door. Before he stepped out into the hall he said, “I’m sorry Buffy…I know you don’t want to hear it, but if you do find a way to feed him and he doesn’t seem to improve… the merciful thing to do is to stake him. You know I’m right.”

Buffy look up at him with her blotchy, tear streaked face and said to him with a horse cold voice, “Get the fuck out, Angel.”

Sighing, Angel turned and walked out into the hall. He heard Fred mention calling someone named Malaya and then rushed past him and down the stairs. When he reached the bottom landing, Angel noticed she was talking hurriedly to someone on the phone. When she noticed him watching her she suddenly stopped and sent him look of distrust. His people were starting to turn against him.

By time Angel reached his car, he had become consumed with anger. Spike had taken Buffy, his position with the Powers and was now taking his friends. He didn’t know how, but he would find a way. He would stop him from waking up. Angel was not going to go down without a fight.


End file.
